“Well, I’m just glad you’re OK. We were worried about you.”
“No, I’m OK,” I say. Feeling anything but OK.
“Your father is still in bed,” she says.
“Shit,” I say. “I can come back. I’m supposed to work Sunday brunch tomorrow, but—”
“No,” she says, cutting me off. “He’ll be OK. It’s just going to take time. People deal with grief in many ways. I’m up at the crack of dawn painting. That’s what keeps me sane. But your father… well, he’s dreading what comes next.”
“What does come next?” I ask. Death is so foreign to me, I really have no clue what happens after a funeral.
“We have to clean out Kyle’s house and then figure out what to do with it after the reading of the will.”
“Right,” I say, rubbing my temple. “The will. When is that again?”
“Friday afternoon. Here at Mr. Edwards’s office.”
“Shit,” I say. “I didn’t realize Mr. Edwards was handling this stuff.”
“He is,” my mom says. “Kyle and Aiden both made wills a few years ago when the business took off.”
“Right,” I say, still rubbing my temple. But the headache isn’t responding to my massages. Hangover, I decide. “Of course they’d just use Aiden’s dad.”
“So you’re coming for that?” my mother asks.
I want to say no. Very badly. But I skipped out on the reception and hearing that my dad isn’t doing well—I decide I can’t.
“For sure,” I say. “I’ll be there.”
“Good.” My mother sighs with relief. “How is Aiden?” she asks. “He was a mess the night before the funeral. Came over to our house and stayed the night on the couch.”
“He did?”
“He was so upset. Did you two have a good talk?”
“Talk?” Jesus. I sound like an idiot today. “Yeah,” I lie. “We did. It was a good… talk.”
“Good,” she says. Also on autopilot. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a stinted, bumbling conversation with my mother before. “You know, most workplaces have bereavement time. You should use it, Kali. This is a huge change in your life. Losing a twin—”
“I know,” I say, too sharply. “And I can’t take time off.” This is a lie. “We’re down a chef at the restaurant and I have to fill in.” Another lie. “Plus, it keeps my mind busy.” Finally, some truth.
“OK, well.” She sighs. “Rest up. You sound tired.”
“I will, Mom. I love you.”
She returns the sentiment and we hang up. I sit on my couch and just… do nothing. Forgetting about my coffee until it’s cold and I have to get up and make another cup.
But now I’m lying to myself. Because I am thinking about something.
Not my dead twin, but Aiden.
His off-limits best friend who I had a one-night stand with last night.
CHAPTER NINE – AIDEN
I heard her leave. She tossed and turned so much last night, I woke up like sixteen times. And usually eleven shots in the span of ten minutes would be enough to sleep through the night, but it wasn’t. I could’ve done a hundred shots and still been unable to sleep last night.
So I heard her leave. And there was this part of me that wanted to take her hand, pull her back into bed, and say, “It’s OK, Kali. It’s gonna be OK.”
But the rational part of me couldn’t tell the lie.
Nothing is OK. My best friend is dead. My business partner gone. And I fucked the one girl who was off limits right after his funeral.
I made the mandatory text a few hours after she left. I knew she’d either be sleeping in her childhood bedroom or at home in the city by that time.
Yup. It was the coward’s way out but it was all I could manage.
She didn’t even read it, so where she is now, I have no clue. The garage is closed on Saturday but I’m down there anyway, looking at the Jeep on the lift. Kyle’s Jeep. The asshole Jeep that flipped and crushed him just four days ago.
I want to send this fucker to the junkyard.
No. I want to take a fucking ax to it and chop it up into little tiny pieces.
It’s an old ’78 CJ7 with a custom lift kit and thirty-nine-inch tires. Helluva good rock crawler. Even without fixing the body and suspension, I could sell this thing for almost fifteen grand. If I did fix it back up it’d fetch twenty-five, easy.
But I’m not gonna sell it. I’m either gonna destroy it or keep it forever.
I remember the day Kyle bought this Jeep. His mom and dad gave him five grand for his seventeenth birthday to get it. Kali was there because it was her birthday too and she also got a car, but one that wouldn’t break down as she was driving it home off the used car lot. We were still kids back then. Still filled with wonder, and excitement. Our futures were bright and far away in our minds.