The Sexpert

And she knows just what to do. (Even if she doesn’t quite execute it with one-hundred-percent accuracy.)

I blow on the tip of his cock (tip number three) with exaggerated puckered lips and his eyes go wide. Which is fabulous. Because now he’s thinking about what I’m doing, not who I might sound like.

My tongue darts out and swipes over the small opening while my hands travel up and down his thick, hard shaft. Twisting just enough. Gripping with just the right amount of pressure. (Tips one, four, and seven.)

Rain is still falling down like a backdrop to the apocalypse. Which is perfect. I don’t even have to bring out tip number two. Spitting on my hands to make everything slide a little smoother.

And then, just as lightning shoots through the sky above his head, I take him into my mouth and suck, a crack of thunder making the building shudder.

His hands go to my wet hair. Guiding me with just the right amount of encouragement.

I open wide, so ready to take him fully into my mouth. My tongue is eager, and things are going so well I’m actually making myself horny. And then he’s inside me, the steady pressure of his hands on my head making me want to give him more.

So I do that. And it’s all pretty hot, and I’m feeling very proud of myself, kinda picturing how many women I’ve helped give the perfect blow job since we put this video out and…

And then I gag.

Like I push him away and it takes every ounce of self-control I have not to just throw up.

“Sorry,” I purr, looking up at him—never breaking eye contact, trying to stay in sexy mode. And then I dive back in, my hands still busy twisting and pumping with just a little more pressure, but this time the second his thick, round head enters my mouth, I gag again.

Oh, my God. I suck. I suck at blow jobs! Not in a good way.

And then I gag again just thinking about putting his cock in my mouth.

Quick, Eden. Quick, quick, quick! You need to improvise.

I lick his shaft. Yeah. That was tip number nine. Lick the shaft and cup the balls.

Andrew moans.

He likes it.

I do it again. Dragging my tongue up and down his cock, giving his balls a little squeeze this time.

Another moan!

Success!

The Sexpert says the blowjob should last between four and ten minutes. I’m on like minute two, which is unfortunate. Because I can’t think of any more tips. I really need to take a refresher course.

Oh, tip ten! Lick his balls. Mmmhmmm. I dip my face underneath him and at the same time I lift his balls up and drag my tongue over them.

“Shit,” he moans.

I pull away, still gripping him, but now I’ve got his cock again. I didn’t make it to four minutes. I know that for sure. But hell, a girl knows her limits.

And besides, I’ve got another idea.

Sexpert video number six. How to Fuck Him With Your Cupcakes.

I smile up at him as I take his cock and push it in between my girls. It’s a devious smile that I think makes him nervous. Because even though his grin is still in place, it’s a little lopsided now.

Shit. Am I doing this wrong?

No. No. I’m the Sexpert. And I have the perfect tits for titty-fucking. All the comments on that video say so.

I place my hands on the outside of my breasts and push, squeezing against his cock. “Fuck,” he says, looking down at me.

Yup. This is the winner. I’m good at this one. Like… if you’ve got the right props, there’s almost no skill required.

I jiggle them a little, then a little harder. I’m trying to get that look on his face again. The one where he’s not wondering about who I might be but getting lost in what I’m doing.

Hmmm. He still looks kinda distracted. So I do a little wink, make this clicking noise with my tongue, and stick my tongue out as I lower my head, licking the tip of his cock again.

I take him in my mouth as he begins to get into it. Rocking his hips just enough to make his cock slide up to my mouth, then withdraw and almost get lost in my bosom.

Yes! Success is mine once again!

He starts moving a little faster, his dick thrusting up, then disappearing in quick succession.

I seal my lips over his head, trying to get up with the new rhythm, but I can’t quite dip my head low enough to keep him in my mouth for the whole cycle, and then the next time he comes up, he does it with a little more excitement, and I’m just thinking this is it. I’ve got him right where I want him… he’s not putting two and two together… he’s not thinking about anything other than what we’re doing right now…