Bull (The Buck Boys Heroes 1)

As soon as it rings through to voicemail, I clear my throat. “Trina, call me.”

I hang up, leaving it at that because what the fuck else am I going to say? I feel like I lost the only woman I’ve ever loved, and the man who saved my life is fighting for his. I don’t know how the hell to change any of it.

Chapter Fifty-One

Trina

I glance down at my phone and the voicemail notification that has popped up on the screen.

It’s from Graham.

It arrived more than two hours ago, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to listen to it.

I can’t.

After I got back to my apartment, I flung myself onto my bed and cried. I wept for the pain that I saw on Mr. Abdon’s face. But, most of all, I sobbed because Graham has lived through so much.

There’s no way I could have known that he grew up in such turmoil.

My heart breaks for the boy he was. At the same time, I’m proud of the man he’s become.

I roll over and stare out into the darkness beyond my bedroom window.

I used to feel content here.

At one time, this apartment was a symbol of the life I wanted.

I craved the independence that living alone in Manhattan gave me. I celebrated the fact that I’d landed a job all on my own, and I welcomed the chance to get to know the men I’d date.

I don’t want that life anymore.

I want the life that I had with Graham.

It’s not the penthouse I desire or the diamond earrings. It’s the moments when he’d look into my eyes or touch me. It was the sound of his laughter and the way he tried to make me as comfortable as he could there.

I felt at home in that vast penthouse because he was there.

A sob escapes me as I think about what I’ve lost.

I can’t make him choose between Lloyd and me, and I know that there’s no way Mr. Abdon will remain a part of Graham’s life if I’m his wife.

I have to follow through with the divorce.

I rub a hand over my forehead.

I’ll still be Trina Shaw when this is over, even though I now wish that I had changed my surname to Locke so I could have been Trina Locke even for a brief moment in time.

I move to sit up just as I hear a soft knock on my apartment door.

I want Graham to be on the other side of it. I want him to scoop me into his arms and tell me that we’ll get through this together, but I doubt it’s him.

He hasn’t tried to call or text me other than the brief voicemail he left me hours ago.

I can’t blame him for giving up. I didn’t respond to him.

It breaks my heart to think that he must feel as though I’ve abandoned him just as so many people have.

The person at my door knocks harder.

I swing my legs over the side of the bed and push up until I’m standing.

Straightening the front of my blouse and skirt, I walk out of my bedroom, just as an even louder knock sounds through my apartment.

I swing open the door.

“Trina, I don’t feel well,” Aurora mutters before she tumbles forward and into my arms.

“I’m feeling better,” Aurora whispers. “It’s probably just food poisoning. I had take-out tonight. Maybe that’s what it is.”

I lead her through the sliding doors of the emergency department at Lennox Hill Hospital.

After she showed up at my apartment door and almost fainted, I sat her on my couch with a glass of water.

She felt nauseous as soon as she had a sip. As she ran to my bathroom, I ordered an Uber, and we headed out together.

My sister, Shirley, had food poisoning once and ended up in the hospital for three days. Being proactive can’t hurt. If anything, a doctor can give Aurora something to calm her stomach enough that she can at least keep fluids in.

“I can call Eldon and your parents,” I offer as we approach the reception desk. “Do you want me to do that?”

“My folks are driving home from a wedding in Indiana. They’re sightseeing along the way. They won’t be back for another two days.” She glances at me. “Let’s wait to call Eldon. His shift ends in a couple of hours. I don’t want him to think he has to rush here because I have a stomach ache.”

I offer her a smile. “We’ll wait.”

“If you need to be somewhere, I can wait alone.”

The only place I need to be is in my bed crying my eyes out.

I squeeze her hand. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Thank you for this, Trina.”

“Anything for you.” I pull her into a side embrace. “I’m here for as long as you need me.”

I mean it.