He let my pinkie go then, but only to grab my whole hand and murmur, “Maybe we shouldn’t talk about this.”
He was thinking about me. About what Corbin did to me.
This was not about me.
This was about Auggie not ever having anyone open the door to him like they were excited as all get-out to see him coming their way.
“What happened when you were deployed and came home?” I queried.
“Sometimes she was home. Sometimes she wasn’t. Why do you ask?”
He didn’t get my question.
I didn’t answer his.
“And she cheated on me when she was in the field,” he explained.
I didn’t say anything.
“Pepper, let’s leave it at this. Cheating is a dealbreaker for me.”
I squeezed his hand. “It is for me too. I didn’t give Corbin a shot either. Then again, he didn’t only do it to me once. But even if he did, I know I’d find it difficult, if not impossible, to bounce back from that.”
“Then we’re down with that.”
“Yes,” I agreed.
He returned my squeeze.
Then he noted, “You two were together for a long time too.”
“We were,” I affirmed.
“But not married.”
That was leading.
“No, not married,” I said. “I wish I could tell you I sensed something wrong, but I can’t. I just didn’t have a good example of marriage. It kinda freaked me out. And when Corbin asked, I told him I’d have a commitment ceremony, go all out. Dress. Cake. DJ. The works. Just not official. I guess, if he turned out like my dad, I wanted an out.”
“He asked?”
“Yeah.”
“And you said no.”
“Yeah.”
“Mm,” he hummed meaningfully.
So I looked at him.
“Do you want to get married?” I asked.
“Yeah, I want that. I also want my kids to have the feeling of safety and stability that would give them.”
I stared at his utterly perfect profile.
And I couldn’t believe it (I blamed the pinkie hug, though the perfect profile was part of it too), but it couldn’t be denied I was thinking I could marry this man.
“It wasn’t out of the question,” I said quietly. “Corbin jumped on us having a commitment ceremony somewhere down the line. We just never did it. I should have known then.”
“Never shoulder that kind of blame, Pepper. That’s on him. All on him. The end.”
He was so right.
And there was something more than a little cool about the fact he got where I was coming from, a little bit.
I didn’t want him to be hurt, betrayed. Obviously not.
But he understood that hurt. It was a dealbreaker for him, as it was for me.
Also for me, that was huge.
To communicate all of that rolling around in my head, I whispered, “The end.”
He let my hand go, but not entirely. He hooked our pinkies again.
Yeah.
I had a feeling I was going to be blaming the pinkie hug for a lot of things.
He then finished driving us to the school, found a parking spot, slid into it, and shut the vehicle down.
When he did, I turned right to him in a manner that his attention came direct to me.
“All day long, I couldn’t wait for you to ride up my street, park in my drive, and walk up my front steps,” I declared. “I was waiting in my office for you so I could witness it happening from start to finish. I don’t know how this is a world where the women in your life did not do the same. And I can’t say every time you come to me, I’ll be in that space. Just that…Auggie, you’re a man to get excited about.”
He didn’t move, not a muscle, not his eyes, which were glued to mine.
All right, perhaps that was too much.
“Maybe we should—” I began.
“If you don’t wanna get fucked stupid in my car outside your kid’s school, don’t say shit like that.”
“Okay,” I whispered.
“I’m super fucking pissed at you,” he declared.
What?
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you’re fuckin’ fantastic and you dicked around and we lost months and that pisses me off.”
Shit.
“Does it help that I’m super fucking pissed at myself for the same thing?” I asked.
“Yeah.” He finally cracked a smile and I relaxed. “It does.”
I smiled back at him.
“Get over here and kiss me but don’t stick your tongue down my throat or we’ll be banned from school premises,” he ordered.
I was smiling bigger before I did as told, including (woefully) keeping it chaste.
He caught me when I was pulling away, cupping my jaw to do it.
“Takeaway from that, sweetheart, is you’re fantastic,” he said.
“You’re fantastic too,” I replied.
“Glad you think so,” he muttered to my mouth, the soft, sexy look on his handsome face muddling my head.
Fortunately (kinda), he let me go, and got out of the car, so he wasn’t in close proximity to muddle my head anymore and I was able to get out of the car too.
And my unmuddled mind caught on the fact he’d said, Glad you think so.