Because damn, did he like to watch that.
But he’d always been vigilant—it had to be on Ashleigh’s computer. She’d give him alone time when he needed it, and never judged (although sometimes she teased mercilessly). And most of the time he was happy to just jerk off to his fantasies, but tonight that wasn’t working. Well, it was working, but every time he closed his eyes and took his cock in hand, his mind was filled with Shane. The rumble of Shane’s voice, and the weight of him pressing Rafa down. A shiver rippled through him, and he cupped his balls.
He groaned in frustration and opened his eyes.
If he was going to be around Shane for months to come, he absolutely could not use the guy for his spank bank. Not because he had a moral or ethical dilemma—fantasies didn’t hurt anyone—but because he’d likely spontaneously come in his pants the next time Shane so much as brushed against him.
Despite himself, Rafa thought of how Shane’s callused hand had felt on his head as he’d flattened him to the sidewalk. How his breath had been hot against the back of Rafa’s neck, his big body covering him completely. Willing to die for him.
Rafa’s cock twitched, and he gripped it. He knew it was stupid—Shane was willing to die for any asshole he was assigned to protect. It didn’t mean Rafa was special. It didn’t mean Shane cared. It didn’t mean there was anything between them whatsoever. Rafa could have been a Labradoodle—it wouldn’t make a bit of difference to Shane. He needed to nip this crush right in the bud. Adriana had mooned over one of her first agents so obviously that the poor guy had been reassigned. Rafa could hide it the way he hid everything else, but it would be better to just not crush on the guy at all.
“Did I hurt you?”
Kicking off his boxers, Rafa gave in and spread his legs, reaching for the lube he’d brought out from the bathroom (purchased by Ash, of course). Closing his eyes, he imagined Shane’s warm, comforting touch. In his mind, those rough hands were skimming all over his body now. Shane kissed him, his lips soft compared to the scratch of stubble on Rafa’s skin, and murmured that he’d go slow in that gravelly voice.
But as Rafa pinched his nipples, he wanted it harder. In his mind, he got on his hands and knees. His hair wasn’t tamed with pomade, and Shane ran his hands through it, pulling Rafa’s head back as he bit his shoulder. His stubble sent shivers over Rafa’s skin as he kissed down his spine, and Rafa shoved a slick finger inside himself, imagining it was Shane’s tongue.
Whimpering, he bit back a groan as he fucked himself with another finger. The first time he’d made himself come with just his fingers, it had felt like a miracle—somehow even more intense than when he jerked his dick.
In his mind, he held his cheeks open with Shane’s face buried there, and begged Shane to shove his cock inside. Of course there were no condoms in his fantasies, and when Shane rammed into him, the burn of flesh on flesh heated every pore. Panting, he jerked himself faster, his fingers pistoning in his ass. He imagined Shane heavy behind him, Shane’s hairy thighs and balls slapping against him, his cock like a hot poker.
Rolling over, Rafa went up on his knees, burying his face in his pillow to muffle his cries. It was awkward to get deep into his hole now, so he concentrated on his cock and balls with his other hand, imagining it was Shane touching him. He pulled down the foreskin, teasing the head of his cock. All the while in his mind, Shane pounded his ass, grunting and murmuring a litany of dirty talk about how tight Rafa was, and how he was a cum slut, and Shane was going to fill him up until it gushed out.
With a groan into his pillow, Rafa came, toes curling as his orgasm vibrated through him violently. After a few gasps, Rafa lifted his hand and licked it clean, imagining it was Shane feeding him his own spunk as he filled his body—cum in his ass and in his mouth, hot inside him and salty on his tongue.
Collapsing onto his belly, he swallowed the bitter drops, knowing he was probably a total freak for eating his own jizz. But until he could eat someone else’s, it was all he had. He moaned softly as he wondered what Shane’s would taste like.
I’d kneel at his feet and let him fuck my mouth. Suck him until he came down my throat, his hands pulling my hair. Maybe he’d smile…
As the glow faded, Rafa hurried to the bathroom and cleaned himself, thanking God that Shane wouldn’t be able to read his mind when he saw him again.