Rebellion at Longbourn

Until this moment Darcy had been blissfully unaware of how spectacularly wrong a declaration of love could stray. He longed to crawl into a hole and hide. Elizabeth studied everything in the vicinity except him—and no wonder.

I have declared my feelings; the honorable course would be to make an offer of marriage. But if she clearly did not return the sentiments, perhaps a proposal was not warranted. And she had told him she planned not to wed. Perhaps he might suggest they both forget the event ever occurred.

Darcy pictured his father staring at him from his portrait in the long gallery at Pemberley. He would never be pleased to find his son taking such a cowardly option. A proposal of marriage was the only honorable choice. And, in truth, Darcy could not imagine marrying another woman.

Perhaps such a marriage would not be a disaster.

Darcy stifled a bitter laugh. Now there are words upon which to launch a hopeful future.

He took a deep breath, speaking quickly before he lost his nerve. “Miss Bennet, would you do me the very great honor of accepting my hand in marriage?”

She will say yes, he thought miserably. There is every advantage on her side. Marriage would greatly benefit her family. I must be content with that. Perhaps she will come to love me in time.

Elizabeth started at the question and grabbed the wrought iron railing as if to steady herself. Surely she had been anticipating the question? For a long moment she remained silent, her eyes fixed on her feet. “Mr. Darcy, I thank you for the compliment of your attentions, but it is impossible for me to accept. I have obligations that preclude marriage. I cannot leave Longbourn. The tenants and my family are in need of my assistance.”

With her head bowed, Darcy could not discern her true feelings. He had anticipated a far more forceful rejection, so he considered what she had not said. She had not been offended or declared her dislike for him.

Her words even left open the possibility that she might accept him under other circumstances—thus fanning the embers of his hopes. Ah, what a fool I am. She may only be sparing my feelings.

“I find your concern for your family and the inhabitants of Longbourn quite admirable,” he managed to say in a choked voice.

The reasonable part of Darcy’s mind urged him to flee Longbourn—decorously—and pack for a return to London. As his eyes traced her beloved features, he knew he did not wish to depart. With a declaration of love lying open and bare between them, he longed to confess everything—and seize what might be his only opportunity.

Darcy leaned closer to Elizabeth, dizzy with intoxication at her mere proximity. He could even inhale her faint rosewater scent.

When she tilted her head up to meet his eyes, he did not care that she had rejected his offer of marriage moments ago. His heart was full to overflowing. He was fortunate just to know such a magnificent creature.

All that remained was to find the words that would express his feelings. Of course, he already knew he would fail since what he experienced was utterly ineffable.

He took a deep breath. “Elizabeth…I am not good at pretty words or grand speeches, but I stand by my declaration. I will not deny or modify it. I am in love with you and have been for these past two years. Everything I have done for your family, I have done for your sake and yours alone. You need only say the word, and I will lay everything I am…all my worldly possessions at your feet.”

For a long moment, Elizabeth said nothing. Her eyes stared into his, and her hand was pressed to her heart. “I do not know why you believe you are not good at expressing yourself,” she said finally, her voice hoarse with emotion. “That was…breathtakingly eloquent. I am…quite overwhelmed.” That truth shone in her eyes.

I should be content with this much. But Darcy had an opportunity to know more, and he would seize it. “Dare I hope you are not indifferent to me?”

She swallowed. Her eyes were huge in her face. “No, Mr. Darcy, I am not…indifferent to you. Only now am I realizing how…” She shook her head and stared down at her feet again as if willing herself not to say more.

Darcy’s heart could scarcely bear these wild swings of emotion. From anger and despair to the heights of hope. “Elizabeth…sh-should circumstances change at Longbourn…might we address this subject once again?”

She gasped, and her eyes shot down to her hand. Following her gaze, he realized his fingers had begun caressing the back of her hand…but she had not pulled it away. The ghost of a smile even played around her lips.

Perhaps she was not indifferent to his attentions. “Yes,” she whispered.

“Circumstances will change,” Darcy said firmly. “And we will readdress this subject. I will hold you to that promise…And I will make a promise of my own….”

Slowly, giving her time to object, he gathered her into his arms. But she was not stiff under his hands; her body was warm and pliable, melting against him. He spared a minute to hope that nobody was watching them from the windows of Longbourn before his lips descended upon hers.

Her kiss was generosity itself. She held nothing back but offered him the kind of passion he had guessed might be bound in her heart. Her lips opened under the probing of his tongue, and he explored her mouth thoroughly. Her tongue did not retreat but entwined with his in a sensual dance. Their bodies melted together until he was unsure which of them held the other up.

Eventually, Darcy reminded himself rather forcefully that they stood on Longbourn’s front steps, where anyone might happen by. He forced himself to release her and descended two steps, away from temptation. But he could not tear his eyes from Elizabeth’s rosy lips or the high color on her cheeks.

“What sort of promise was that, Mr. Darcy?” she asked a bit breathlessly.

She gave him a pert smile and he supposed he could make a joke, but at the moment he was capable of only earnestness. “It was this sort: I have not surrendered. I will do everything in my power to encourage your acceptance of my hand.”

Did he even have the right to make such a declaration when she had told him weeks ago that she did not plan to wed? Perhaps he would seem to be disregarding her wishes.

But she laughed a deep, throaty chuckle. “I see. Well, I have been warned.”