Opening my apartment door, I’m hoping that really soon, like tomorrow, I’ll be able to call it our apartment again. Hopefully, after we talk, she won’t be leaving because that’s unacceptable.
Keeping my hand on her back, I usher her toward the sofa and watch as she gets herself comfortable. She kicks her shoes off and sighs in relief.
“Sorry, my feet ache when I’m on them for any length of time, so does my back.”
“I want you comfortable.”
I kick my boots off and sit in the chair facing her.
Now we’re in the same room as the other, neither of us seems willing to talk.
I’m more interested, at least for now, in sitting and admiring her pregnant form. She has always been beautiful to me, but now there is a glow about her. Her curls down her back shine, but it’s her swollen belly that my eyes keep going back to. My child. I’m going to be a father.
I quickly move my hand away from my chest when I realize I’ve been rubbing where my heart rests. It hurts with the love I have for Dahlia, and now, our child.
Dahlia offers a soft smile, and says, “Jace said you had a phone call, which explains the way you were thinking when I ran.”
Fuckin’ Jace.
I guess I’ve nothing to lose by telling her now, plus we need to clear the air if we’re going to have any chance of a future, which I want. “Evan called to let me know Brittany didn’t have long left. She’d been diagnosed with cancer before my visit to see her about the divorce. I couldn’t carry through with the divorce knowing that she was dying and only had a month or two left.”
Glancing at Dahlia, I notice the tears swimming in her eyes as she covers her mouth with her hand.
I just need to get this out.
“What you heard in the bar was me panicking and not wanting to drag you into my mess. Although the situation was different, it was still your mom all over again and I couldn’t do that to you. I was afraid that if I told you, you’d walk away. So yeah, I did tell Jace that I’d have to let you go. Except by the end of our conversation, which you obviously didn’t hear, Jace had talked me into calming down so I could think rationally.
“My intention in the end was to tell you what was going on and giving you the choice . . . but you left, so I thought it was for the best.” I shrug. “Brittany went a bit longer than expected and by the time she died, we’d become friends of sorts.”
Do I admit about going after her or keep it to myself?
Oh, fuck it!
“After she died, I flew to Portsmouth. I’d always planned on coming after you when I was completely free to do so, except I hadn’t planned on seeing you with . . . someone else.”
And that was the obstacle I couldn’t get past.
Dahlia wipes her tears away, and meets my gaze. “I’m so sorry I left before we could talk. If your words hadn’t broken my heart then all these months wouldn’t have been wasted. I’d have stayed with you had I known.” She shakes her head in anguish.
“If you overheard me in the hospital to Mia, then surely you heard about Max being gay. He really is a good friend, but that’s all. I could never be with anyone else, Ryder. I can’t believe you think I could.”
I shake my head. “I didn’t want to think that. I just saw what I did, and I know now, how wrong I was. I didn’t want to talk when you came to Kix because I was scared of what you were going to say . . . I had no reason to be, did I?”
“No. You saw Max and presumed I’d come to gloat or something. Rub the pregnancy in your face.” She sounds angry now.
But I admit, “Something along those lines.” I decide to go full out and continue, “My heart was breaking seeing you standing there looking like a million dollars with the guy I thought you were with.”
Tears brim in her eyes as she moves over to me and starts to kneel at my feet. No way is she doing that. Without thinking, I grab her and place her in my lap.
As she curls into me, I hear a sigh escape her lips.
Holding her in my arms feels like the most natural thing in the world. Neither of us says anything, we just absorb the other.
I rest my chin on the top of her head and admit, “I’ve missed you every second of every day.”
Hearing my words, she presses her face against my chest and kisses me there.
She takes hold of one of my hands and, after bringing it up to her mouth where she kisses