13
Blake
The night and morning I’d spent with Violet had been amazing and for the first time since the accident, I felt like a whole man. It isn’t easy having to rely on the chair or on Violet, but I do. Except maybe I can learn to be more dependent on myself for once.
Which is why I’m with Kasey’s older brother, Aiden, as we listen to the sales man waffle on and on about the adapted car. I’m in two minds about it because it isn’t my truck. I love my truck, which is currently being used back home by my friend Roger. At least I know he’ll look after it. But I miss that thing … and him.
When I’d mentioned to Aiden about starting to think about the future and the fact that I might be stuck in the wheelchair for the rest of my life, it was him who suggested we visited here. A friend of his from Aiden’s racing days owns this dealership, but my heart feels heavy.
I’m hoping I’ll suddenly get the use of my legs back, but am I just kidding myself? Perhaps I am in some way. I really don’t know. Even though I had readily agreed to this visit, I’m struggling to look over toward the vehicle in question.
I don’t want to learn to drive an adapted vehicle, and if I’m not careful I’m going to be throwing a toddler fit. The only reason I’m here is because I want to be able to do things for Violet instead of her having to do everything for the both of us. I’d be able to go to the local farmers market and get the food she likes, I know how much she hates going. She hates the gossiping amongst the locals and the way they look at her because she’s from out of town. Personally, I don’t give a shit how they look at me, but her, it pisses me off.
“You haven’t heard a word he said, huh?” Aiden stares at me and I realize the guy has disappeared. “Figures.”
“Aiden, I’m sorry. I know gaining more independence was my idea but now I’m here I’m struggling to accept that this is my life. It’s never been so apparent as it is now that I’m facing an adaptive car.”
Aiden’s thoughtful and then without saying anything, he pushes me toward the vehicle and doesn’t stop until we’re at the open driver’s door. “Look at it Blake. The only difference is there are no peddles. The controls are all in hands reach. Other than that, everything else is exactly the same.”
“How would I get the chair in the car if I’m already in it?” I frown. “I’d more than likely have help at home, but not at my destination.”
Aiden glances back. “You’re right … They have the large vehicles with a ramp into the back—” he trails off. “Or not.”
“I don’t think I really thought this through.” I glance away, my dreams of shopping for Violet fading. “Can you drop me at the gym?”
He nods. “Let’s go.”
Inside the car I stare out of the front window while Aiden shoves my chair into the trunk.
“I should have thought this idea through more, or at least researched vehicles online first. I’d have been better prepared.” I pensively mutter to Aiden.
“I’m here to help you when you’re ready, Blake.”
“I appreciate it, thank you.”
Aiden smirks and shakes his head. “Nothing to appreciate. We’re family. We’re there for each other … you Just have to ask, Blake.” He pulls up in front of the gym and gives me the time I need to get myself back into the wheelchair. “I’m going picking a few things up for Sarah.” His gaze softens when he mentions his pregnant wife. “Call me when you’re ready to head back. I’m your ride for today.” He grins.
I roll my eyes and shove toward the gym, gliding through the automatic doors, and only then do I let my smile slip. I know Aiden didn’t mean anything with his words, but it was more of a reminder that Violet isn’t around than anything.
She’s kept her interview in Boston but insisted that the only reason she still went was because she didn’t want to ruin her chances of something in the future by cancelling on them at the last minute. I still don’t understand why she went because surely, she intends on turning it down if she gets the offer. So I don’t see the difference between cancelling and rejecting the job offer.
“Blake, no Violet?” my gym instructor asks.
I grit my teeth, and snap. “No.” His eyes always follow Violet and it grates on my damn nerves. Half of the time I think he only does it because he knows how much it pisses me off. I work harder when I’m angry, which he’s figured out.
“Warm up.” He h
olds the door open as I wheel into the gym and over to the room at the back. The table is low enough to begin with, so I drag myself onto it.
Mitch takes the table up and quickly starts working the muscles in my legs. As his hands rub and knead into my thighs, I suddenly start feeling like I’m being stabbed with thousands of needles and gasp for breath. He stops and looks hard at me while I pant and try to catch my breath. “Needles.”
Immediately he knows what I’m talking about. “Tell me where it hurts the most.”
He’s taking his time, so I lean forward and press on my thigh, wishing for the pain to go away. It’s not a small case of pins and needles, it’s a full on attack centered in the middle of my left thigh. As soon as I point the spot out, Mitch knocks my hands away and warns, “This will probably hurt to begin with.”
The minute his words leave his mouth, he presses and massages the center of the pain. I have to clench my jaw tightly together to prevent my shout of pain escaping. When it finally ends subsides to a slight ache, I sag against the table, sweat pouring from me.
“I think,” Mitch grins above me, “that things are looking on the more positive side.”