“Why not?” he argues. He stands up and faces Mel, who is standing with her arms crossed, glaring at him. “Assuming you’re a chef, I’m doing exactly what you do, only because it’s not the norm…” He pauses. “…according to you, it’s weird.” He glances at me. “If you’re as closed-minded as your friend here, then maybe I’m not a good fit for your trip.”
“Close minded?” squeaks Mel. “I—”
“Mel gets passionate about some topics,” I quickly explain, cutting her off. I stand up and take him by the arm, leading him over to the door before she can antagonize the guy any further. “As cute as it is watching you two together, I’m kind of on a time crunch here. Maybe you can continue your arguing on your own time?” I smile and close the door in his face, feeling only the slightest pang of guilt in doing so.
“Was that all so you could rip into the guy?” I accuse Mel once I’ve moved him on.
She gasps, her wide blue eyes proclaiming her innocence. “Me? You're blaming me for that?”
“How else did cat suit guy get onto my list?” I growl, narrowing my eyes.
Her eyes twinkle as she breaks into another fit of laughter. “Okay, fine. I had to see if he was serious. I mean, who does that? His whole concept is flawed and makes no sense.” She shakes her head and I can’t help but laugh. It’s clearly been bothering her.
“If you’re that keen to hook up with the guy, do it on your own time,” I grumble, playing up my annoyance. Because I am annoyed—at myself, for birthing this whole stupid idea.
The truth is, Steve is looking like a pretty good prospect at the moment. This whole trip feels more and more unreachable as the minutes go on. I'm not sure how much more I can sit through.
It’s a sunny Thursday afternoon and we are in downtown Melbourne, in a king suite at one of the classiest hotels in the country. After Calli freaked out at my original idea of just holding the interviews at my house, I gave in and agreed to book a hotel room. At such short notice, my choices were limited to a penthouse king suite and a pokey little room in a nearby two-star hostel.
I stand up, make my way over to the large king-sized bed, and collapse onto it. I feel instant relief as my head hits the soft mattress, and I’m pretty sure I made the right choice.
“Are you okay?” Calli’s voice sounds a million miles away.
“I'm fine,” I mumble. I'm just exhausted. And depressed. And anxious. Hell, the list goes on. I open my eyes as Mel kneels beside the bed and kisses me on the forehead.
“It'll be okay. We’ve still got three more, not to mention the other few hundred emails we have to go through.” She hesitates before adding, “I’m sorry for adding Steve, Ez. I just thought it might lighten you up…”
“It’s not that,” I sigh. I feel bad for taking my frustrations out on Mel and on poor Steve. “I’m just feeling less optimistic by the second. You know things aren’t good when he’s currently topping the list,” I say, forcing a smile. “Sorry, Mel. I’m sorry I’m such a downer. I’m just exhausted.” I don't want to admit it, but I'm tempted just to can the whole idea. My family would love that.
“You’re allowed to be,” Mel laughs. “Have a sleep. Or just lie here and listen. If we can't interview these people for you, then what's the point in us being here?”
I can't even be bothered arguing, so I nod my approval and arrange myself further under the covers. She kisses me again on the top of my head and wanders out of the room, sliding the door closed behind her. I can just make out her voice as she fills the other girls in.
My body thanks me as I allow it the one thing it’s been demanding all day: rest. I finger the soft silk sheets and wonder why it's taken me so damn long to stay in a hotel as nice as this. Everything, from the tiny bathroom amenities to the incredibly comfortable bed, screams luxury. I'm even rethinking my accommodation choices that are already booked for the trip. It's funny that even now I'm so concerned about money and how much I'm spending. Why? For? It’s not like I can take it with me. I should’ve gone all out. I chuckle to myself, imagining my parents’ reaction if I’d blown my entire fifty-grand savings on this trip. But you know why you didn’t go all out. Because that cash is reserved for something more important than fluffy pillows and oversized beds.
I drift in and out of sleep over the next few hours, not even bothering to listen to the interviews. I couldn’t keep myself awake even if I wanted to. Which I don’t. If there’s anyone even worth considering, I know they'll let me know.
My eyes crack open. As I glance around the neutral-toned room, it takes me a second to remember where I am. Definitely not in my own, brightly coloured pink and grey-toned bedroom. The last of the evening sun glares through the tiniest crack in the blinds. I throw the covers back and drag myself out of the bed. I glance at my phone to check the time. Nine o’clock. I’m not sure if I love or hate daylight savings, because sunlight at this time of night isn’t natural.
If it's even possible, I
feel worse than I did before. My head pounds, which tells me I need more sleep and probably more medication, but the painkillers nearly knock me out, and I don’t have time for that. I have things to do—things that won’t get done unless I drag my arse out of bed.
“Feel better?” Calli asks as I flop myself down on the couch.
I shrug.
She throws herself down next to me and wraps her arms around my neck. “Long day, huh?”
“That, and…” I press my cheek against hers. “I guess I had stupid expectations that I would find the perfect person today. I mean, the first two, Crystal and Dean, were both great people, and it’s incredible that they even want to help me out, but…”
“They’re not right?” supplies Calli.
“Exactly,” I sigh. “They’re not right. For some silly reason, I had it in my head that I’d know when I met the right person. God, it sounds like I’m preparing to get married. It’s just a trip, right?”
It’s not like anyone is dying. Oh, wait…
“All jokes aside, what if I'm just sabotaging myself? What if no one can be good enough?” I shrug, the anxiety in my chest crushing me. “You know me, Cal. I'm not a people person. This whole idea is—”