Out of Reach (Love Hurts 2)

It would’ve been easier for him to tell me a year ago, or ten years ago. To hide the way he felt in order to preserve our friendship spoke volumes about the kind of man he was.

I had messed things up, and I didn’t know how to right them. I didn’t know if Seth and I could go back to how we were. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to—because deep down, on some level I wasn’t quite ready to admit, I think there was some truth to what Andy had been saying. I think there was a part of me that was in love with Seth. And if there wasn’t—I was pretty sure there could be.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Seth

It was after ten in the morning by the time I’d worked up the guts to return to the beach house. I wasn’t looking forward to seeing Em or Andy, but it wasn’t like I had the time to put it off. One day could mean the difference between being able to make peace or never saying goodbye.

Goodbye.

I dreaded the moment where I’d have to say that. It was so final, but I suppose so was death. I walked in through the back. Marta looked up from the magazine she had in front of her at the table.

“Seth, thank God.”

“What’s going on?” I asked. Something was wrong. I could feel it. “Is he okay?”

“The doctor’s been here. It’s not good. He’s resting now. He’s on a high dose of morphine for the pain, which means he sleeps a lot.”

My heart raced as I ran down to his bedroom. Stopping in the doorway, I stared at him lying in the bed, asleep. Em looked up from the armchair. She’d been crying. Her eyes met mine, a fresh wave of tears spilling down her cheeks.

I walked over to her and knelt down. She fell into my arms, sobbing against my chest. I stroked her hair gently with my fingers, my eyes not leaving Andy. He was so pale, his breathing worse than I’d seen it. A breathing tube was in place in his nose, forcing oxygen into his lungs.

“Shh, Em, it’s okay,” I mumbled.

“I’m not ready to let him go,” she whispered, her nails digging into my back. I just held her, knowing there was nothing I could say right then that could make it any easier.

“I’ll be back in a second.”

Out in the kitchen, I leaned against the counter and sighed. I needed a moment to get myself together so I could be strong for her. I’d spent so much time focused on Em and Andy that I hadn’t allowed myself to process what was happening.

Andy was dying. This was it, his last days, and maybe hours. Should I let Deb know that he’d gotten worse? No—the last thing I wanted was for them to be driving upset. I just hoped they would hurry up.

I carried a cup of tea and a chair back into the room.

“Thanks.” Em smiled, accepting the cup I held out for her.

I sat the chair next to her and slumped down, snaking my arm around her shoulders.

“Listen.” She hesitated, studying the contents of her cup. “I’m sorry for yelling at you yesterday.”

I shook my head. “No, look, it’s fine. I get it. It must’ve been a shock.” I laughed and shook my head. “I still have no idea why he told you.”

“Because she needed to know.”

Both Em and I looked over at Andy in surprise. He hadn’t moved. His eyes were still closed. I was beginning to think that maybe I’d imagined it, until he spoke again.

“What time is it?”

I laughed and wiped my eyes. Reaching over, I took his hand. “You scared me, man. I thought you’d left me without saying goodbye.”

“Yeah? Kind of like the way you stormed out of here yesterday, huh?”

I laughed. “You’re a dick. But I love you, Andy.”

He managed a smile. “You two need to promise me that you’ll look after each other, okay? That’s the only thing I want from you: your promises to be there for each other.”

“Of course. Don’t even worry about that, Andy,” I muttered. Em nodded in agreement. “Your mom is on her way,” I added.