“How are the girls?” I ask, bypassing the pleasantries.
Dad sits down, his expression sour. “Like you really give a damn about either of them.”
I sigh and close my eyes. “Yell at me all you like, but tell me how they are first. Please.”
“Stace will be fine. She’ll be in hospital for a while, but she’s okay. She ruptured her spleen and had to have surgery to remove it and to fix a broken leg.”
Fuck. I can’t stand the thought of her being in pain because of me.
“And Kara?” I’m nervous, because I’m not sure I can handle hearing anymore bad news. What if it’s really bad? He and Mom exchange glances. I narrow my eyes. “Tell me.”
“She fractured her spine and probably won’t walk again.”
My heart races. I lay my head back, overwhelmed with emotion. I’ve ruined her life. I’ve fucked up everything.
“I’ve ruined everything,” I mutter, closing my eyes.
Neither of them speak for a moment, which just makes my anxiety worse. Finally, Dad clears his throat.
“We can make this all go away.”
I let out a laugh. Does he think that’s what I want? And there’s no way the media isn’t going to get ahold of this. I’m angry with myself and I’m angry with them. They’re trying to do the good parenting thing and visit their son in hospital, but I can see it on their faces: they don’t want to be here. All my disappointments together don’t come close to topping this one. I’ve proved what my parents have thought all along.
I’m fucking useless.
“How?” I say, anger pulsing through me. I’m so damn angry with myself. I could have killed them. I promised Stace I’d always be there to look after her, and then I pull a stupid move like this.
“You agree to go to rehab and get yourself fixed, and this whole mess will go away.”
“People deserve to know—”
“Why?” he interrupts, his eyes darkening. He has no sympathy for me at all. Not that I blame him. I deserve everything I get. “What’s that going to achieve? You want to help Kara? Stop this from happening again.”
“And how do Stace and Kara feel about this? And Uncle Dan?” I ask. “She won’t walk again because of me.”
“They all want what’s best for you,” Dad says quietly. “Think about it, Saxon. If you won’t do this for yourself, do it for your sister.”
I scowl at him. How dare he drag her into this. Of course I’m going to do whatever Stace wants me to, but I don’t need to hear it through him. I need to see her. Throwing the covers back, I swing my legs over the edge of the bed and stand up. I’m unsteady, but after a few seconds I feel confident enough to walk.
“Where is she?” I ask. “What room is Stace in?”
Dad opens his mouth, as if he’s going to argue, but then reconsiders.
“Five doors down on your left. Kara is in intensive care and can’t have visitors.”
I stand at the entrance of room twelve, unable to move.
Seeing Stace lying there like that, her face all cut up kills me. I walk over and sit down, ignoring the pain radiating through my chest. She wakes, her eyes widening when she sees me. She smiles and grabs for my hand.
“Sax,” she whispers, her eyes sparkling with tears. “I was worried about you. And Kara…” She chokes up as her voice trails off.
“I’m so sorry,” I mumble. I reach out and stroke her hair. “I’m a mess and now I’ve dragged you and Kara down with me. Dad wants me to go to rehab. He wants to keep this whole thing quiet, but people deserve to know what a fuck up I am. I don’t deserve for all this to just ‘go away.’”
“If you won’t fix yourself for you, do it for me. Please,” she whispers, tears rolling down her cheeks. “I don’t want to lose my brother.”
I study each bruise on her face, guilt stabbing through me. It’s the least I can do after what I’ve done.
“Rehab where?” I ask, my voice thick with emotion, aware my parents are now standing behind me.