“Dukie!” cried Maddie, as mom’s cavalier spaniel hauled himself into her arms. Maddie lay on the floor, giggling as Dukie lapped at her face, tail wagging furiously.
“Down Dukie,” she giggled, getting to her feet, but still patting the overexcited spaniel.
“Why don’t you take him out the back, Maddie?” I suggested. She didn’t need to be told twice. She sprinted to the door, as mom made us a coffee. I sat down at the table which overlooked the backyard, watching Maddie and Dukie play.
“What’s going on, honey?” Mom placed the hot cup in front of me.
“Everything’s a mess. Claire kissed me, Emma found out.”
“Oh Simon,” mom gasped, clapping her hand over her mouth.
“I know, mom. I should’ve told Em as soon as it happened, but her memory was so weak already, I just didn’t want to add to her stress. I’ve fucked things up pretty bad.” Mom raised her eyebrows at my use of language. “Sorry,” I said, feeling all of about ten.
“So why are you here, Simon?” she asked gently. That was a good question. Why wasn’t I at home, fighting for my girl?
“I’ll give her a few days,” I finally sighed. “At least until tomorrow. I’m afraid if I push her, I’ll push her too far.”
“And Claire?” mom asked.
“What about her?” I asked, confused.
“Are there any feelings there at all?”
“None.” If there was anything I was sure of right now, it was that Em was the only woman I wanted.
After mom’s homemade meatloaf, the three of us sat on the couch watching TV. With one arm around Maddie, I dug my phone out of my pocket. No calls or messages. What was I doing? I needed to at least let Em know how much I loved her, even if she wasn’t ready to hear me.
I love you more than I love anything on this earth. Please talk to me Em.
I sat my cell on my knee, glancing at it eagerly every time the reflection from the TV bounced off it. I tried convincing myself I wasn’t expecting a reply, but deep down I knew that I was. When an hour passed and I hadn’t heard anything, I slipped my cell back in my pocket. Maddie had fallen asleep next to me. I scooped her up and carried her to bed.
Mom handed me a coffee when I returned to the living room.
“So how are you?” she asked. I shrugged.
“I’m okay. I’ll be fine, mom.” I kissed her forehead. “I might hit the sack too.” It had been awhile since I’d gotten a decent sleep.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Emma
I love you more than I love anything on this earth. Please talk to me Em.
I read the message over and over. Cass smiled at me sympathetically.
“Just reply to him, Em. Imagine how bad he would be feeling,” Cass encouraged. I so badly wanted to, I really did, but something was stopping me and I couldn’t even try and put into words what it was.
“I better check on Mirabella,” I sighed.
Edging open the nursery door, I tiptoed in, sitting down in the nursing chair next to the cot. I smiled at my little girl, who lay sleeping soundly, as if she had no worries in the world. How perfect babies had it. I hoped that feeling lasted for her, for much longer than it had for me.
The room looked perfect for a little girl. The yellow we’d painted the room in had been replaced with a soft pink, which complemented the white furniture perfectly.
Pictures of Simon and I sat framed on top of the wardrobe. I stood up and made my way over to them. The first was taken on one of our first dates. Of course in those days all of our ‘dates’ had been in my apartment, but those nights still felt special. Picking up the second picture, we looked so happy. Simon’s eyes were on me as I smiled into the camera. His love for me was obvious from the way he was looking at me.
Staring hard at the picture, I realized something. This had been taken the night he proposed to me. I remembered. I remembered the meal he had prepared for me, the amazing sex we’d had and the way afterward he’d pulled out the ring on the balcony and dropped down on one knee.
Wiping away tears, I reached up to my neck and fingered the ring that hung on my necklace. Reaching up, I unclasped the necklace, letting the ring slide off the fine silver chain and into my palm. I slipped the ring onto my finger.