The ride to Mom and Dad’s proved to be just what I needed. I could feel my body relax as the cold air from the wind hit my senses. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. No matter what the hell I did, she was on my mind, in my thoughts. She was everywhere.
I’d avoided practicing with the band the last couple of days because I couldn’t handle being in the same room as her. It was just too hard. I was lucky that I had so much shit to organize for the festival. It gave me a legitimate reason for not being around. In reality, all I did was drive somewhere isolated where I could lie down in my car and think.
About Her.
I parked my bike in the garage and walked inside via the internal door.
Mom was in the kitchen cooking. She looked up and smiled at me. “Good, you’re here.” She smiled and kissed me on the cheek. “Can you set the table, sweetie?”
I nodded numbly, collecting four plates from the cabinet.
“Oh, four more places, Sax. Dan, Sheree, and the kids are coming too.”
I let out a small groan of agonized frustration. Fucking great. Because all today was missing was a meal with my aunt and uncle, the cousin I’d paralyzed and her brother and his constant snide comments. Please, could I have any more reminders today of all the ways I’ve fucked up repeatedly?
“Don’t start, Saxon. Just for once can we have a nice family dinner without all the drama?” Mom asked, seeing my sour expression.
“Tell Harry that, not me,” I muttered. I knew I sounded like an obstinate child, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t in the mood for any of this today. If I’d known it was going to be more than just Stace and me, I never would’ve come.
Stace wandered out of her bedroom, her eyes lighting up when she saw me.
“I didn’t know you were coming,” she said, hugging me. I grunted in response. “What’s with you?” she retorted with a scowl.
“Nothing, I’m just in a shitty mood,” I muttered, slamming the last plate down on the table.
“For God’s sake, Saxon, just leave it and go sit down,” Mom ordered, irritated.
I shrugged and left the half-set table, slumping down on the armchair in front of the TV.
Stace sat down next to me. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked.
“Not really.”
She rolled her eyes and gave me a smile that said ‘I’m going to keep bothering you until you tell me’
“It’s nothing, Stace. Just let it go.”
“Is it to do with your girlfriend?”
“She’s not my girlfriend,” I growled.
“I’ll take that as a yes. What happened? Did you say something and fuck it up? You better not have, because I really liked her.”
You would, you were practically the same age. And for what it’s worth, so did I
“Why does it have to be something I did?” I grumbled.
“Because it usually is,” she giggled. “Whatever happened, can you work it out? I know I only met her twice, but I saw the difference she made to you.”
I rubbed my head and sighed. “It’s not that easy. She lied to me,” I said.
“What about?”
I knew she was going to keep pushing me until I told her. That’s what she did.
“She’s seventeen,” I muttered. Oh God, saying it aloud sounded worse than it had in my head. “She’s eight years younger than me. I could barely get past the four-year age gap. But eight? When I was eighteen, she was fucking ten,” I muttered.
“Holy crap,” she gasped, her eyes wide. “Wow. I’m older than her?”