He left The Club on autopilot, slipping into his car and driving out of the private lot, mulling over the fight. He may not have reacted in front of Preston, but the blank space in his memory was frightening in a way he hadn't experienced since returning stateside. Bad things happened in those blank spaces, things he couldn't take back.
It took him a minute to realize where he was. He'd crossed the street and sat idling in the back parking lot of Divine Twins. It made no sense. Vivian hadn't called him. A light coming from one of the windows didn't guarantee that it was her inside the building. Most importantly, he didn't have a right to stop by and check up on her, especially not at this god-awful hour of the morning.
His body had a mind of its own though and he found himself staring at the door, stomach in weird knots. He knocked, silently ran through a series of foul thoughts at his stupidity, and tried to decide if he could run back to his car. Footsteps approaching the door prevented his escape. Instead, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and prayed that he didn't terrify some poor worker who found him hiding in the shadows.
When the door didn't open, he rested his weight back on his heels and called out, "Viv? You in there?"
That did the trick. Locks disengaged and a sliver of light appeared when the door opened a crack.
"Zeke, what are you doing here?"
God, just her voice was enough to send a cascade of lewd thoughts through his head. How was it possible to have this kind of a connection with a woman after such a short amount of time? And why the hell did the few days he'd been out of contact with her feel like a lifetime?
"I'm sorry."
The door opened a little more and he could finally make out a slice of her face and body thanks to the dim outside light. Her hair was pulled up, her sleeves pushed above her elbows, and a well-used apron covered her soft curves. Her expression was one of cautious amusement and it hurt more than he liked to know that he was responsible for her guardedness.
"Thank you?" she offered. "You didn't have to stop by to say that though. I got your message."
Damn. So it was a conscious choice to not call him back, despite his earlier attempts at salvaging the situation. Time to go, idiot.
"Ah, good. Well, just felt it was only right to tell you in person too. So...yeah..." He looked around him, grateful for the pre-dawn darkness. At least then no one would see the flush that was burning over his face. He gave her a curt nod. "See you around."
***
In her recent days of moping, Vivian had allowed herself the luxury of imagining situations when she'd run into Zeke again.
Sometimes she was the sexy, confident woman walking boldly into The Club, on special invitation from Mr. Mak or another Karim bigwig, passing Zeke with a toss of her hair and making him regret losing her to another man who could appreciate her and satisfy her insatiable sexual urges.
Other times, it was something out of a rom-com. He'd walk into her bakery, all doe-eyed and miserable, proclaiming his undying affection for her mind and body. She'd spurn him, sending him on his way, only to listen to her customers' advice to forgive him. A short race down the street in a light rain would end with her catching up to him and kissing him while cars stopped around them, filled with applauding drivers.
Sometimes it was less fantasy and more the mundane hope that they'd go out on one more date and he'd talk to her, tell her about his past, and they'd decide to give it another shot.
Anything but this.
"See you around?" she asked, crossing her arms and glaring at him.
"I..." It was comical to watch his awkward shrug, his hands still trapped in his pockets, his shoulders hunching protectively. "I just wanted to apologize."
"Which you've done several times now without specifying what you're apologizing for. I mean, is this an I'm sorry I let it get this far since I'm giving up on you sorry, or an I just realized I'm kind of acting like a new stalker and don't want you to think I'm crazy sorry?"
His forehead furrowed. "How about I'm sorry I was a dick at dinner?"
"Thank you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got an order to finish up."
She tried to close the door on him, but he reached out and placed a hand against it. "Viv, I mean it. We were doing fine before that fecking dinner–"
"You're right."
Stand-off. She didn't have anything to lose though. He was the one seeking her out, not the other way around. And if he wanted her back, he'd better prove it. It took him a long time to start talking again.
"My past isn't something nice women like. They like the fame, but not the rest of the shit that comes after serving in a combat zone. Leaving is usually easier for them."
"Easier is overrated. You don't think I should decide whether I want to stay with you or not? A bit egotistical."
"Probably."
"I'm a grown woman, Zeke. I'm not going to sneak out of your bed one night and move across the country to get away from you. We'd at least have a conversation before we decide to not see each other anymore."