“Uh-huh.” Damien could sit with that while I continued looking for the power screwdriver to get this bad boy off its hinges quicker than his regular one. We had to take it down and clean it up anyway. Might as well break it in with some beer and TLC.
“The door will be perfect for good old beer pong and tonight that’s all I care about.” I was disappointed that Hunter wasn’t coming to the party. I knew he was pissed at me for something, yet again, so the show was going to go on with or without him.
I called Kristen and told her to get over here stat. She was the perfect best friend on the planet because not only did she show up twenty minutes later, but she had the back of her hand me down Subaru Outback loaded with alcohol and food from the grocery store.
“Damien!!!” Kristen banshee screeched at the top of her lungs, making the mirror I loved so much in the foyer rattle against the wall.
“Geez, you didn’t tell me you were inviting a poltergeist for the evening.” Damien and I looked at each other and the only answer I could offer was a smile and a shrug.
“Oh, please, I’m a succubus.” Kristen flitted into the house like a dark fairy Queen. I admired her ability to remain cool, calm, and collected with this member of the Hart family.
“She sucks something all right, rhymes with dick.” I slapped him hard in the chest.
“Stop it Damien.” Chastising him was pointless.
“See, it’s like you’re not even trying.” Her hands flew up in the air and she continued lecturing him. “Turn your hearing aid down if I offend you so much!” Kristen was still yelling at the top of her lungs, and we both watched Damien turn his hand over his ear, middle finger up of course like he was actually turning a hearing aid down.
Grabbing Kristen, I pulled her into the kitchen. “Come on, KC, we can set up things in here. Not too much trouble we can get into in the kitchen.” Before I could get her help setting up a makeshift table for food and drinks on a piece of plywood and two sawhorses, she’d already backed out in the hallway, half stomping up the stairs.
“Go empty out the back of my car.” Kristen was perched on the stairs, ready to go after Damien.
At this point I felt bad, but the two of them were constantly going at each other with no provocation.
“Can’t you do it yourself?”
Oh, Damien… I wondered how he’d survived this long without Kristen killing him or as Hunter suggested a few times politely, fucking him to death.
“You really want me to come up there, don’t you, Damien?” Kristen had her hands on her hips and her threat seemed extreme even to me, and I wasn’t on her shit list.
Damien came to the top of the stairs, smirking and his arms crossed over his chest. “If I’m turning into your workhorse, I get to cop a feel.”
“Oh, please, I’ll run my fingers through my own hair and grab my own ass, jerk.” Which was exactly what Kristen did as Damien lifted a brow, watching her comb out her tangles and lift her boobs.
“God, woman, keep your broom stashed in the closet and I’ll empty the fricken car.” Damien came down the stairs, each pound of his feet louder than the previous one.
Kristen followed behind him, stopping in the foyer to stand with me. He went out into the driveway, and we watched him grab a box through my temporary lace curtains.
“Shouldn’t we help him?” Nudging Kristen, she smiled and turned her head toward me.
“Nah, he’s doing just fine.” Shrugging, Kristen went back to the kitchen to set a few things up.
“The ice can go in the antique tub. With some of the bottle and can drinks.” Thankfully, my tub was totally salvageable once we hosed it down after the incident. I held the door open, and Damien came up the steps, a large crate of alcohol in his arms.
“Your best friend is a real pain in the ass.” Damien set the crate down in the hallway and bent down to pick up a chain of garlic bulbs tied together like a necklace, handing it to me.
“And yet you both torment the hell out of each other. I wonder what I should make of that, Damien Hart. Someday, you two will grow up and wonder at all this wasted time you spent torturing each other.”
He snorted as I tapped my finger to my chin, contemplating, until Kristen chuckled from behind.
“Oh, you’re still here?” Kristen pointed to the garlic Damien handed off to me, and I looked between the two of them curiously. I wished they would take their quarrel somewhere else or bang it out like respectable adults our age.
Damien leaned in close, getting in Kristen’s face, smiling. “Wrong demon, sweetheart.”
“My mistake. I
thought you were the blood sucking kind. I’ll get the silver bullets next time.”
“Oh, for Pete’s sake, you two. Knock it off. At least for tonight, play in your respective corners and let’s have a good time. Look, see, all the alcohol in town, perfect for you two.” I brushed past them both and headed out to the car to get the next box of supplies for this evening’s gathering. I would never understand what drove those two to be so blood thirsty mean one minute and almost jumping each other in the next, not that either would admit to the latter fact.