Loki curses and clenches his fist. Shaking with rage, he seems to try his hardest not to punch a hole through the table.
"Father, I hate to break it to you but just because you named me after the god, doesn't mean I can live up to the reputation," Loki says.
But even he knows how dumb that sounds now.
At first, I was a skeptic. Now, it's a little hard to deny the obvious facts.
Hellhounds...
Lucifer...
Ash.
Shit, the world could be governed by a special group of people. It's highly probable that the bad ones have gained control. And now it's clear, I had something to do with that.
"Son, you are smarter than this. I am not responsible for your name. Do not deny who you or I am," Odin says.
Loki licks his lips but no amount of wetness can moisten the cracks that have formed out of stress. "That world has long since passed, father. The legends have died. Valhalla is no more. I’m afraid my old playfulness has been lost.”
"You are a god. You will always be a god," Odin says. "Maybe not a great one, but a god nonetheless. The sooner you come to terms with it, the sooner you'll learn how to harness your true powers."
"I am a blacksmith now; a simple welder, " Loki contends. "That's what I vowed to be. I'm no fighter. Not anymore. If you need help, ask Thor."
Irritable and non-allowing of bullshit, Odin stands and grumbles something none of us can hear. It sounds like words from an ancient language. "Do not fall into the same trap that I did," he finally says. "Escaping isn't the answer. We all have a destiny. We all play a part in making sure that is fulfilled."
"Thor isn't coming back," Heimdall says. "You know that, Loki."
Turning toward Heimdall, he raises one arm into the air and says, "I am old and much too tired to argue about such important matters. Please, Heimdall. Teach my son to give a damn about eternity. The rest of the world can revel in the nonsense. They will let clowns rise to power, only to see their hopelessness presented on a larger mirror. That reflection is a danger to us all. You can break the glass and shatter the spell forever. As for me, it is time to dream until the sun comes back to haunt me awake. Now, if you'll all excuse me, I must go."
Heimdall's jaw tightens. His eyes are stern, and he only betrays the slightest amount of worry. "Of course, I won't let you down," he says, adding that "none of us will."
"Good, good," Odin mumbles.
Loki is visibly mad. As soon as Odin is out of sight, he turns and walks into the backyard. "Somehow, you were always the favorite. The mother-fucking-son he never had."
Once again, Heimdall motions for us to stay put. There's a history here that we are unaware of. "Everything good?" I ask.
Heimdall nods. "There's a lot to unpack here. I see that Odin has set up a bed in the living room. Please, feel free to take as much time as you need to rest. Tomorrow might not be so easy."
"Thanks, Heimdall," I say.
He follows him outside to calm his friend's nerves.
He leaves us alone.
In the dark with only the moonlight shining across our bodies...
Ash looks at me first, calling me closer to him with the pull of his eyes. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" he asks.
Sex? Powerful and chaotic lovemaking?
I doubt that is what he's thinking about, but for some reason, it's heavy on the mind. It's probably because the idea of losing this world makes me cherish it all the more.
I tell him the truth, but I disguise my emotions in the best way I can. "To be honest, my mind is a little blank tonight. My heart feels pretty heavy," I say.
"Mine too," he admits.
"What were you thinking?" I ask him, hoping he'll ask to lay down next to me. Hoping he'll ask if he can hold my hand and tell me everything will be alright. The smallest gestures matter the most in these trying times.