I stood and walked to the counter, setting the empty water bottle in the recycling.
“She’s messed up, Ren. Like, really hurting.”
He had no concept of the agony his words inflicted. I planted both palms flat on the surface of the countertop and squeezed my eyelids closed, fighting every single instinct I had. All I wanted to do was crush every bit of hurt and sadness clouding her gorgeous green eyes. But the fact was, I’d put them there. And I couldn’t achieve what I was trying to achieve without hurting her. Didn’t mean that seeing it and hearing about it didn’t kill me. What was the alternative? Do what I did last weekend? I’d cracked. I’d sat on that bench long after she’d left, and I hadn’t been able to erase the devastation on her face or the pain in her voice. They’d repeated on a loop in my mind until I’d wanted to smash my way through everything in my path. Numbing myself hadn’t helped, instead of making everything go away, the half bottle of whiskey had weakened my defenses. Her beautiful fucking face, those slim curves wrapped tight in a little black dress, had taken up every inch of space in my head. She’d been the only damn thing I’d wanted.
And I’d found myself outside her trailer, knocking on her door.
Thinking about that night wasn’t good for me. If I were being honest with myself, I’d say it scared the shit out of me. Staring down at her wavy blonde hair spread out over the pillow beneath me, her cheeks flushed and her trusting eyes gazing right into mine, feelings I thought I’d forced into submission had hit me square in the chest with the force of a sledgehammer. The thought of letting her go, of walking away and leaving her, had wrecked me. For a second, I’d thought about staying. So, I’d disconnected before she’d even stopped clenching around me. Then I’d brought up a fucking ten-inch thick wall and reinforced it with steel.
We didn’t have a future. There was no us. I had to remember that. I couldn’t keep slipping carelessly in and out of her life, muddying the waters and blurring the lines, just because I couldn’t control my dick. We both needed a clean break. Even if it had taken everything I had in me to walk out of that room.
Unimpressed by my lack of response, Leon pushed to his feet, his head shaking and his eyes speaking his displeasure better than any words could. “I’ll leave you to it, then?” He posed it as a question and hesitated, awaiting a response.
Face impassive, I obliged. “Yeah, sure.”
He exhaled through his nose, a clear snort of displeasure, before he turned and pulled the door open. “Yeah, sure man.”
My mouth opened, unplanned words spewing from my lips, “Le...”
He pivoted swiftly, brows raised. Mine drew together. I fucking knew I shouldn’t say it, but I was about to, anyway. “Watch out for her... yeah?”
The corners of his lips twitched briefly, like he knew I’d tried to stop myself, and couldn’t. Throwing me a quick salute, he dipped his head, eyes solemn when he replied, “Always.”
I didn’t know why the fuck his response had my hands fisting; the skin stretching taut over my knuckles. Or why I wanted to tear his face off. But I stood there, face blank, watching my best friend leave to go take care of my fucking girl, and all I knew was, I fucking hated it.
I was still stewing, trying to figure out what the hell my problem was, when I heard his phone ring through the open window.
“Yo? What!?”
My eyes narrowed at the change in his tone and I edged closer, my curiosity peaked. Leon stood motionless, phone pressed to his ear, his free hand landing on the back of his head.
“What the fuck is she doing there?” He dropped his hand, digging into his pocket for his keys and jogging for his car. “I’m on my way. You called Mack? Just tell him to meet me there.” He cursed, shut his phone off and flung the driver side door open.
“Le?” I called. His head lifted, blue eyes meeting my questioning ones. “What’s up?”
Wedging himself between the open door and the car, he gripped the edge of the frame. His other hand rested on the roof, playing with the keys in his grasp, as he weighed up the benefits of
telling me. We both knew he’d tell me. Resignation flashed in his gaze. Drawing his lips tight, he cocked his head.
“That was Liss. Riley’s wasted.”
I felt my chest tighten; my shoulders immediately stiffen. That was before he finished.
“She’s over at Baker's field.”
My jaw strained. I could tell by the look on his face I wouldn’t fucking like the next part.
“With half of Dalton’s fucking football team.”
I was moving before he got the words out, slamming the trailer door without bothering to lock it, and striding for Leon’s car. His forehead touched the roof of the car briefly and he muttered a fuck.
I threw the passenger door open and, as soon as his ass hit the leather, said, “Fucking drive.”
Dalton Academy. Otherwise known as the school for every rich, entitled prick in Richmond West. To say I felt uneasy was a massive fucking understatement. My knees bounced, fingers flexing. Christ, I’d have been less uptight if she were back in East side, slumming it with drug dealers and bare-knuckle fighters, which said a fucking lot about the character of those assholes from Dalton. These were guys who’d date rape a girl for daring to say no, because the word didn’t fucking apply to them. And the football Gods? Yeah... egos the size of the empire state building and wallets to match. Top it all off with the fact that Mommy and Daddy’s pockets happened to be deep enough to cover the cost of the average cop’s integrity. These guys did whatever the fuck they wanted, and they were fucking untouchable with it. Riley with those guys, drunk... my teeth ground until my jaw ached. If they’d fucking touched her...
Leon swung the car into a muddy verge, the back tires sliding. I was out and pounding a path through the trees before it came to a complete stop.
“Ren! Fuck dude, hold up!”