“Mm. I love the way you milk it. You’re still so tight. I want to come inside you.”
I wanted him to. I loved the way it felt and somehow knowing he was leaving a part of himself behind had meant something to me before. Now it seemed like too much, too personal.
“Please, don’t.” I was shocked as the words fell from my lips without thinking.
“Where do you want it?” He kissed my ear and chills went down my neck and shoulder all the way to my hip.
I didn’t know what to say. I was near tears and angry that he was about to leave me all alone in his stupid castle with no one but staff, who were damned near invisible. “I don’t care, but not inside me.” My voice broke as tears spilled down my cheeks and he stilled behind me.
“Carrie?” He pulled away and tried to roll me toward him, but I fought against him with my eyes closed tight. I didn’t want to look at him; I didn’t want to see his face ever again.
I wished I could open my eyes and be back in Nebraska, and that this had all been a terrible dream. But there was no such magic here.
“Look at me, Carrie. Talk to me.”
“Why, do your other women talk to you, cry for you?” I didn’t want to be like all the rest. “I thought you wanted this.” He pressed his lips against my shoulder and held me. “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”
“How many women have you brought here?”
“Carrie…” he started, his voice cautious.
“Tell me, Chance. I’m one of how many? Dozens? I mean, because you’re ‘swimming in pussy’ right?” I couldn’t help myself.
He took a deep breath behind me. “So, you did overhear?” he said quietly.
“It’s not like you two were being quiet,” I answered.
“Then you heard me say that I you were different,” he said, turning me to face him.
“I heard you say you weren’t going to fuck up the good thing you had going because of me,” I said, refusing to meet his eyes.
He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. “That was for Nate’s benefit. I didn’t like that he was pushing me, and honestly, Carrie, this is all new to me.”
“What, fucking a virgin?” I spit.
“Stop that,” he said, sharply. It’s different with you, Carrie.”
“So different that you’re holding me to my contract, instead of taking me home with you and treating me like an actual human being?”
For once, he didn’t have an answer, and I could actually feel my heart breaking.
“I don’t know how to do this Carrie. I’ve never felt like this before,” he said quietly.
Determined not to let myself get sucked back into his emotional immaturity, I steele myself and said the most insulting thing I could think of. “And you’ve had enough practice at to know, haven’t you?”
He opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it again without a word. A brief flash of pain shown in his blue eyes and he rolled over and got out of bed.
I watched him walk to the shower, fighting the urge to cry until he had shut the bathroom door behind himself. Once I heard the click of the lock, I let it all out, sobbing into my pillow until I fell asleep.
When I woke in the morning, Chance was gone.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN - CHANCE
Things had been a disaster since leaving Ireland. I had gotten caught up in a delay on Proctor’s end and ended up finishing out the week in New York. I had tried to talk to Carrie a few times to apologize and check in, but her distance didn’t have anything to do with the miles between us.
I had just tried to call her again when there came a knock at the door. I crossed the room, listening to the endless series of rings as I let Nate in. He was going to fly over to Nebraska and meet with the environmental team.
I gave up the call and tossed the phone to the couch where it bounced off and hit the rug. “She’s not answering. The deadline is close, and by the time I get there, I’ll only have a few more hours with her. Not that it’ll matter.”