Joshua and I talked a little more, mostly about how we were both sorry for the way things ended between us. He knew he was lucky to be alive and he didn’t want to waste the gift by continuing to be a huge dick. We admitted that we were never right for each other, and we promised to stay civil for Michael’s sake. It was hard, but the conversation ended well.
“Go see him,” Joshua said. “Just try.”
“Okay.”
I said goodbye and stared down at my phone. I thought about calling Michael, seeing if he would meet me, but that didn’t feel right. After everything, I knew we needed to talk in person. This wasn’t a conversation we should have over the phone.
Tucking my phone into my pocket, I ran outside. It was freezing, but I barely felt it. The only thing on my mind was getting to Michael’s place and making things right.
As I drove through town, I cursed myself for being so stupid. How could I have let my anger get the better of me that way? Why didn’t I just let Michael explain himself? All of this could have been avoided if I had just taken a step back and calmed down. I felt like an idiot as I pushed my foot down harder on the gas and turned down Michael’s street.
The lights were on in his house when I pulled up. I shut off my car and ran to the front door. When I knocked, I was out of breath and I could feel my hair whipping around my face in the wind.
“Julie?” Michael’s eyes flew wide with surprise when he saw me standing there. He stood in his doorway, staring at me like he wasn’t sure if I was real.
“Can we talk?” I asked. “Please?”
“Sure.” Michael stood aside and let me hurry past.
He led me into the living room and gestured toward a chair for me to sit. I shook my head and instead walked over to the fireplace. It was lit, and the flames warmed my body, sending waves of confidence floating through me.
“What are you doing here?” Michael asked softly. “I mean, I’m happy to see you, but I thought… Well, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”
“Honestly, neither did I,” I said.
“Then—”
“I’m sorry,” I said quickly. “I made a huge mistake the other day. When you came over to explain, I should have listened to you.”
“You were upset,” Michael said with a shrug. “I understand.”
“That doesn’t make it right,” I said. “If I had known what happened, I never would have—”
“What happened?” Michael interrupted. “You mean, you know about…”
“Joshua,” I said with a nod. “I know about his accident and about your biological mom. I know everything.”
“How?” Michael blinked and took a step toward me. He searched my face, more confused than ever.
“Joshua called me to explain everything,” I said. “He told me all about the accident. He said you were at the hospital all night and that’s why you never called.”
“I was going to,” Michael said. “I had my phone out, ready to dial your number when Sheila walked up.”
I nodded. “Joshua told me about that, too.”
“I didn’t forget about you,” Michael said firmly. “I could never do that. I just… I didn’t think. I was distracted. Everything happened so fast.”
“You don’t have to explain,” I said. I hurried forward and took his hands. He looked surprised, but he didn’t pull away. “You don’t have to explain anything.”
“I’m sorry.” His voice was soft and low.
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” I said with a laugh. “I’m the one who should apologize. I should have been there for you. I should have been the person you could talk to about this, and instead, I just pushed you away. I’m so sorry, Michael.”
“I’m just glad you’re here now,” Michael said.
His smile was weak and uncertain, but it was there. Now that I had a chance to really look at him, I saw how tired he was. His dark blue eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep. There were bags beneath them, and his cheeks looked sunken. I hated myself for leaving him to deal with everything alone.
“How was it, seeing your mother?” I asked gently.