Alyssa blinked a few times in surprise. “Talk to me about? Like what?”
“Like your mother.”
Those three little words brought a thick and awkward silence. I quickly gathered my laptop from the couch to give them privacy to talk. I knew from Alyssa that her biological mother was a painful subject that she rarely talked about with her father. They normally pretended that she didn’t exist, just like the way she’d done with them for a majority of Alyssa’s life.
“I’ll give you both some privacy,” I said, passing by Alyssa who set a few shopping bags down on the floor. “I’ll be in the guest room.”
“You can stay here,” Alyssa said. “You don’t have to leave us alone.”
I caught Gabriel’s troubled stare over the top of Alyssa’s head. “It’s okay. Your dad wants to talk to you.”
A frown tugged at Alyssa’s mouth as she took in my full lips and flushed cheeks. She glanced over at Gabriel, who turned around to gaze out the windows again.
“What’s going on?” she asked. “What’s wrong with the both of you?”
“Nothing is wrong,” I said hurriedly. “Come find me after you’re done talking to your dad. We can go get some coffee later.”
I walked down the hallway in the direction of the guest room. Closing it behind me with my foot, I sank back against the door with my laptop clutched closely to my chest. I let out a trembling breath.
“Holy fucking shit,” I gasped. “What the hell is happening?”
I ran a trembling hand through my hair, and I walked across the room to set my computer down on the bed before collapsing on it. I sucked in a deep breath as I tried to keep control over my racing heart. If I hadn’t pulled away, there was no doubt what would’ve happened with Gabriel. Neither one of us seemed to understand the pull between us; even though we knew it couldn’t happen.
It couldn’t happen. At all. This sort of thing would destroy Alyssa in the process if she knew that I had nearly let things go too far between her father and me. Still, the ache between my thighs was almost unbearable.
I slid my hand down over my flat belly and under the thin fabric of my sweatpants. I spread my legs slightly and parted my tender folds with my fingers, feeling the thick wetness at my core. I sighed softly as I sank a finger into myself and imagined it was Gabriel’s thick member. I stroked deep inside myself a few times before pulling out and spreading my juices over my swollen clit. I rubbed myself in small, quick circles until I came, biting my lip so I didn’t scream. I lay still for a few moments afterward, trying to slow my breathing back to normal. Now that I had relieved the ache, I felt confident that I could avoid Gabriel and any more awkward situations.
The door to my bedroom opened thirty minutes later when I was absently scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed. I caught sight of the pale look on Alyssa’s face, and a stab of fear went straight through me. She sat down on the edge of my bed with a numb expression on her face.
“What is it?” I asked, closing my computer. “Alyssa?”
“My mother is here in Chicago,” Alyssa said. “That’s why my father came home. She came by his office to serve some papers, to tell him that she is suing him for something to do with his work.”
I let out a relieved breath before scooting close to sit next to her on the edge of the bed.
“She’s trying to sue him?”
“Something about copyright issues,” Alyssa mumbled, shaking her head. “I never realized how much of a bitch my mom is until now. She didn’t even want to come into the city to see me, you know?”
“She hasn’t been a part of your life since you were a baby. She doesn’t deserve to know what is going on in your life.”
“It still hurts, though,” she said, wiping at her eyes. “I just wish she would stay away for good and stop torturing my dad. I know it broke him when she left and that’s why he’s never remarried, or even dated much. He’s given his whole life to me, and as much as I appreciate that, he deserves not to hurt all the time.”
I felt a pang of sympathy for Gabriel, and for my friend who was clearly distraught that the woman who had given birth to her wanted nothing to do with her.
“I’m sorry, Alyssa,” I said, wrapping an arm about her shoulder. “I know it’s fucked up. Some people aren’t meant to be parents, you know what I mean?”
“No kidding,” Alyssa replied, sighing.
Even though I was not in a good place with my own mother right now, I knew she still loved me in her own way. Growing up with my mother hadn’t been a horrible experience. Money had never been much of an issue. She made sure that I had what I needed or what
I wanted. Nothing drastic had happened until recently. It wasn’t until the past few years that she decided to start finding love that I noticed our relationship had completely changed in ways that hurt more than I wanted to admit.
“I’m thankful for my dad. He’s never made me feel like I can’t ever go to him with anything that is going on my life. Speaking of my dad,” Alyssa twisted around to look at me with a frown. “Are you sure everything is okay with you? The two of you looked like you were upset about something when I walked in.”
“It was nothing,” I said, rising from the bed to avoid Alyssa’s eyes. “He was upset with your mom, so I think that’s what you were picking up on. Everything’s fine.”
The lie felt bitter on the back of my tongue. I tried to keep my face straight when I turned to look at Alyssa as she gazed at me.