Two Weeks of Sin

I had thought he had the best intentions with me, considering how he’d been, but now I realized that he saw me as less, some inexperienced little girl and not up to the same standards as the others. So, what if I didn’t have experience? I had wanted so badly to show him that it didn’t matter but I’d ended up running out of energy. He had me down on the bed curled in a whimpering ball as he ground his cock into me from behind. It felt amazing, and I wanted to close my eyes and imagine us that way forever. But I knew it was not meant to be. When I’d thought that I was some special choice, that this was something he was trying because he found normal relationships boring or a threat, I had been okay with it. But knowing I was one of many, just another hole to use, bought and paid for, I felt cheap. Not special. Not chosen.

“Does it feel good, angel?” The words at my shoulder brought tears to my eyes and anger through my veins as my blood pumped faster.

I controlled my temper. “Yes.”

“I’m sorry I have to go away. I know it doesn’t matter much to you now, but I really wanted us to have more time.” I considered what he was saying. More time? To do what? Pretend we were a couple, to take me on shopping trips and buy me things so he could make me think he cared? I wanted to knee him in the dick, but I was too busy enjoying the feel of it working me close to another release. I was glad my back was to him. I didn’t want him to know how much I liked it. But then another orgasm came, causing me to hiccup a sound of pleasure and to tighten around him, trembling with my release.

“Mm. I love the way you milk it. You’re still so tight. I want to come inside you.”

I wanted him to. I loved the way it felt and somehow knowing he was leaving a part of himself behind had meant something to me before. Now it seemed like too much, too personal.

“Please, don’t.” I was shocked as the words fell from my lips without thinking.

“Where do you want it??

? He kissed my ear and chills went down my neck and shoulder all the way to my hip.

I didn’t know what to say. I was near tears and angry that he was about to leave me all alone in his stupid castle with no one but staff, who were damned near invisible. “I don’t care, but not inside me.” My voice broke as tears spilled down my cheeks and he stilled behind me.

“Carrie?” He pulled away and tried to roll me toward him, but I fought against him with my eyes closed tight. I didn’t want to look at him; I didn’t want to see his face ever again.

I wished I could open my eyes and be back in Nebraska, and that this had all been a terrible dream. But there was no such magic here.

“Look at me, Carrie. Talk to me.”

“Why, do your other women talk to you, cry for you?” I didn’t want to be like all the rest. “I thought you wanted this.” He pressed his lips against my shoulder and held me. “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

“How many women have you brought here?”

“Carrie…” he started, his voice cautious.

“Tell me, Chance. I’m one of how many? Dozens? I mean, because you’re ‘swimming in pussy’ right?” I couldn’t help myself.

He took a deep breath behind me. “So, you did overhear?” he said quietly.

“It’s not like you two were being quiet,” I answered.

“Then you heard me say that I you were different,” he said, turning me to face him.

“I heard you say you weren’t going to fuck up the good thing you had going because of me,” I said, refusing to meet his eyes.

He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. “That was for Nate’s benefit. I didn’t like that he was pushing me, and honestly, Carrie, this is all new to me.”

“What, fucking a virgin?” I spit.

“Stop that,” he said, sharply. It’s different with you, Carrie.”

“So different that you’re holding me to my contract, instead of taking me home with you and treating me like an actual human being?”

For once, he didn’t have an answer, and I could actually feel my heart breaking.

“I don’t know how to do this Carrie. I’ve never felt like this before,” he said quietly.

Determined not to let myself get sucked back into his emotional immaturity, I steele myself and said the most insulting thing I could think of. “And you’ve had enough practice at to know, haven’t you?”

He opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it again without a word. A brief flash of pain shown in his blue eyes and he rolled over and got out of bed.

I watched him walk to the shower, fighting the urge to cry until he had shut the bathroom door behind himself. Once I heard the click of the lock, I let it all out, sobbing into my pillow until I fell asleep.