Fighting.
Lights whizzed above my head and machines beeped harshly in my ears. Doctors were buzzing around me as I felt a small hand slip into mine. I curled my fingers over the warmth before a small head fell to my chest.
I cupped the head of my son, so lost and confused.
“Come home, Daddy. Please.”
I felt tears crest my eyes as my jaw began to quiver.
“Come home and watch a movie,” he said, breathlessly.
How many times had I heard that plea? A movie. That was all they wanted. To curl up on the couch, snuggle under a blanket, and cuddle into me while watching a movie. And how many times had I refused? Postponed our dates for work calls, then lost myself in balance sheets until two in the morning? How many times had my twins fallen asleep on the couch waiting for me to get home and fulfill a promise I made them?
No more.
Not another promise would go broken and not another plea would go unanswered.
I lifted myself from the hospital bed and felt a pair of hands against my back. I looked over and found her eyes. Those eyes that hel
d so much guilt, pain and sorrow.
The eyes of the first person I’d neglected on my journey to the top.
“You’re still here,” I said.
“Of course I am,” Brooke said. “Where else am I going to be?”
I didn’t really know.
I honestly figured she would go home.
The doctor came in and took one last look at me. He checked bandages on my head before he released us to go home. I cradled my son in my arms as Brooke steadied me, and the three of us slowly got into the back of a cab. Pulling up to my house seemed ominous. Empty. The shadows loomed heavier and a sinister mood hung over the property.
But my son wanted to watch a movie.
And that was what I was going to give him.
We all settled down on the couch and turned on the television. The Jungle Book was fifteen minutes in and I went to change the channel. But Daniel stopped me and pulled the blanket over our bodies.
He wanted to watch Sydney’s favorite Disney movie.
So, I sat there, with Brooke in the crook of my arm and my son’s head on my thigh as silent tears dripped down my neck.
I would watch my daughter's favorite Disney movie without her there.
Not knowing if she would ever be back to watch it with us again.
CHAPTER 20
BROOKE
I wished I’d never taken this vacation.
Cleaning up after one child only served as a reminder of the other one that wasn’t there. Setting out one child’s plate for dinner only reinforced the empty seat of the other. Daniel was constantly asking where his sister was and when she would be back. Every time Daniel mentioned her I watched Kevin’s heart break a little more. He was in a constant trance, volleying between being present with his son and lost in his own private hell. He had spent last night passed out in the chair on the porch after downing glass after glass of whiskey, just trying to dull the pain.
It physically hurt to do anything. Chasing Daniel around left me breathless with guilt and tucking him in forced me to stare at Sydney’s empty bed.
“This isn’t your fault,” Morgan said.