One More Time

“I hear with my ears,” she said.

“That’s good. What do you do with your eyes?” I asked.

I could feel everyone’s eyes on me as a smile broke out across Lanie’s chubby little cheeks.

“See!” she said.

“Good girl.”

I turned toward the door, but I was halted in my tracks by a small little tug at my jeans.

“Lanie, let her go,” Brian said, sternly.

“Food?” Lanie asked.

My eyes looked over to her nanny who was now scurrying to her side.

“Let’s get you something to eat,” she said.

“No. Amanda food,” Lanie said.

“Are you asking me if I’m hungry?” I asked.

“I think she is,” the nanny said.

“Tanya, right?” I asked, recalling the name Brian had used when he’d spoken to her.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“No ‘ma’am’ necessary,” I said, smiling. “I have food back at my place,” I lied. It was clear Brian didn’t want me here, and though he was nice to look at, he was kind of a cocky asshole.

“Food with us?” Lanie asked.

“No.”

Brian’s voice was stern and caused me to jump. It was a tone of voice I’d heard many times when I was with Daryl. That tone of voice that spoke of controlling intent and disapproval. Hearing that tone drip from Brian’s lips only fueled the anger that bubbled in my gut whenever I thought of that pathetic bastard.

“How about this?” I asked as I looked at Lanie. “When I get my cabin repaired, you can come over anytime you want, and I’ll cook us something.”

“Pancakes?” Lanie asked.

“That’s enough, sweetheart,” Tanya said.

“If that’s what you want, that’s what you’ll get,” I said.

“Pinky?”

The little girl held out her pinky finger, and my eyes drifted up to Brian. There was a storm of emotion rolling over his face. Anger and apprehension and sadness. There was a wall coming up over his entire face that set it in stone. His brow was furrowed with a deeply-set frustration that made me curious about him.

What was a man with a child doing on a mountaintop that had nothing to enrich a child at all?

“Pinky promise,” I said.

I reached down to link the little girl’s finger, and she smiled broadly. She let go of my pants and allowed me to leave the house, her eyes following me as I left. I hobbled down the porch steps and began limping back toward the cabin.

My mind started running through all the things I could do to make it better before I had to get creative.