I met his gray eyes, but he looked away from me, and back to my mother.
“Everything is ready,” he said gently.
“Ready for what?” I asked.
My mother glanced at me, her eyes sad. That one glance, that one expression, made that finger of ice on my spine turn into a frigidly cold fist that grabbed and squeezed my heart. My breath caught in my throat and the feeling of dread that settled over me was oppressive.
“Your father will explain everything, dear,” she said.
Without a word, Terrance turned and led the way down the hall to dad's office, simply expecting us to follow in his wake. Adam was the first one through the door, sauntering into the office, Danielle at his side.
“Wait here, peach,” he said, kissing her and motioning for her to sit outside. “Family business.”
Danielle didn't argue, but she looked over at me, an inscrut
able look in her eyes. When we were together, she'd been considered family, and was allowed to sit in on all family meetings and functions. We hadn't been engaged, but most people considered it to pretty much be an inevitability, and my family had simply accepted her as my wife-to-be.
Now that we were done, and she was with Adam, she'd been downgraded to just a girlfriend. A hanger-on. An outsider who didn't warrant a seat at the family table. It was petty, but it gave me a small sense of satisfaction. I headed into the office without sparing her another look, but she grabbed my arm as I was passing her by.
“Malcolm, can we talk afterward?” she asked.
I pulled my arm away and didn't bother to answer her. I had nothing to say and there was no reason for me to have a conversation with her. I held the door open for my mom, who gave me a curious look.
She mouthed, “What happened?”
“Later,” I told her.
I knew I'd have to explain everything to my family sooner or later. I'd figured I'd have more time to broach the subject. My family had come to like Danielle a lot and I knew our split was going to hit them a little bit hard. Then she showed up hanging all over Adam though, and the cat was out of the bag about our breakup. There was no gentle way to break it to them after that. Oh well – not much I could do.
I stepped into my dad's office and closed the door behind us, shutting Danielle out. If she'd wanted to be part of this family, perhaps she should have acted like it. Betraying my trust was not the way to go about it. I would have done almost anything for that woman, and she’d taken it for granted. And now? Hooking up with my half-brother not even twenty-four hours after we'd broken up? That was low, even for her. Though, I guess I should have expected her willingness to stoop to that level after what she'd done to me. I probably shouldn't have been all that surprised.
My dad's office had always been a sacred space. His sacred space, to be more precise. It was a sanctuary I hadn't been allowed to set foot in until I was old enough to work for him. Which in his eyes, was when I was fifteen. I worked for him after school while others played football or went on dates or did whatever it was kids my age typically did.
My dad though, had insisted that I forgo the usual teenage activities and demanded that I devote myself to learning the business. There were times I resented it, sure. But, I bit the bullet and I was there. Every single day until I went off to Stanford for college, I was there. I did everything he wanted to and more, getting to know the business inside and out. Every single facet of it.
Still, even though I was older now, I still stepped inside the hallowed walls of his private sanctuary, and held my breath as I took it all in. As crazy as it sounded, there was a reverent and almost spiritual air about the place – probably because it was such a forbidden room to me when I was young. It still held some sense of mystery and awe to me. The room was dark, with rich wooden walls and floors, and a massive Cherrywood desk in the center of the room. A wine-colored rug took up most of the floor, and at the helm of it all, his presence as dignified and commanding as ever, was my dad. In his usual spot in the chair behind the desk, surrounded by bookshelves taller than any of us, he gazed at us as we situated ourselves.
There were no photos or any personal items in my dad's office. Something I always thought a little strange. I'd want to be surrounded by my personal effects in my sanctuary. He always said though, his office was a place for work. My dad had never been a very sentimental man and didn't have time to deal with overwrought, emotional drama. He was a no-nonsense, business first, kind of man.
Adam dropped down onto the black leather sofa that sat along the wall, facing Dad. My mom joined Dad behind his desk, her posture perfect, her hand on his shoulder, standing tall. It was like they were posing for a photograph or something. Terrance stood on the other side of my dad, his hands at his side.
They all stared at me as I quickly considered my options. I looked over at the sofa but had no desire to sit next to Adam; not with the way he was sitting there smirking at me. Instead, I chose to remain standing near the front of his desk. Terrance offered me a seat – there were two leather chairs flanking the sides of the desk-- but I shook my head. No, as much as I disliked Adam in that moment, I was determined to avoid making a spectacle of myself.
“I prefer to stand,” I said.
“Very well,” he said.
He nodded gracefully and stepped back to his position beside my father. The circles under my dad's eyes were darker than mine – and I know for certain he hadn't been out drinking the night before.
My dad was a man that never needed more than four hours sleep a night, but it was exceedingly rare to see him looking so tired. His white hair was thinning even more than I'd remembered, and his skin was sallow and thin, as if you could see through it. His eyes were the same blue color as mine, – people often said I looked like a younger version of him. I had the same blue eyes and sandy blonde hair that he'd had in his youth. Given that my dad had been a good looking, strapping young man, I'd always taken it as a compliment.
Dad cleared his throat, and we all stood at attention. Even Adam stood, joining me at the front of the desk as if to hear things clearer, a smug little smile on his face. I really wanted to smack it right off of him. Adam probably thought this had to do with Dad's will, and he, of course, wanted a piece of that. I could practically see the dollar signs in his eyes and see him coming up with the list of shit he was going to spend it all on.
“As you're all aware, I saw my doctor last week for some test results,” he said, his voice still strong and commanding. It echoed throughout the room like rolling thunder. “And the results were not good, as we feared.”
Mom's eyes filled with tears and she squeezed his shoulder, wiping away the tears with her other hand. I inched toward her, but she held out a hand, telling me to stop.
As with all things, I obeyed my mother.