“This is my job,” she said. “I can’t do this here.”
“Shut up,” I said firmly. “Stop thinking so damn much.”
“So you want me to be stupid?” Tara asked, her eyebrows raised.
“You couldn’t be stupid if you tried,” I said, laughing. “I want you to relax. For five minutes.”
She sighed and stared at me. I could see how much she wanted to give in. Her body was wrapped around mine, and she showed no signs of moving. We kissed again, and this time, it was enough to make my dick twitch in my pants. Tara felt me get hard beneath her. She pulled away with a grin.
“That’s my cue.” She stood up and walked away from me.
“Fucking tease,” I said playfully.
She laughed and waved me away. I grabbed my stuff and followed her to her desk. The best part of having Saturday sessions was that Tara was the only PT in the building. The worse part was that she always jammed her schedule. She had back to back sessions all day, leaving us no time to be together.
I hated it but more than anything, I was worried she would push herself too hard. This cancer wasn’t something to take lightly. I saw the effects on her face every day. When a headache caught her by surprise, the pain was evident. She winced and her eyes glazed over. She couldn’t focus on anything. She could barely speak.
Every time I looked at her, I searched her face for a sign that she was in pain. Nothing she said could calm my nerves.
“Have you told your dad?” I asked as she sat down behind her desk.
She jerked her head up. Our eyes met, and she shook her head, quickly looking away again.
“Tara,” I said. “You can’t keep putting this off. He needs to know.”
“Why?” she asked. “The doctors haven’t even planned out my treatment yet. They have an idea. Chemo. Radiation. Possibly surgery. But they don’t know anything. I have to go in for more tests, and then I’ll tell him.”
“You will?” I asked. I knew she was lying.
“I’ll tell him when it’s time,” she said evasively.
“And when will that be?” I demanded.
“Caleb, back off.” Her eyes were narrowed and her voice was sharp.
“No,” I said firmly. “Look, you know I’m not your father’s biggest fan. Truth is, I can’t stand the asshole.”
“Caleb.”
“But,” I said loudly, “he’s your dad, Tara. He loves you, and he deserves to know the truth, okay? You can’t hide from this forever.”
Tara glared at me, but I didn’t back down. I was right, and she knew it. Darren was a doctor, for fuck’s sake. If any parent deserved to know their child had cancer, it was him.
“It’s not that easy,” Tara said. “What do I say? ‘Hey dad, I’m dying. Talk to you later.’ Not exactly something you can put on a Christmas card.”
“You tell him the truth,” I said.
“I know this isn’t fair to you,” Tara said. “You’re the only one who knows and that puts pressure on you.”
“You think that’s what this is about?” I asked, taking a step back.
“Well, yeah.”
“No.” I laughed. “God, Tara, I don’t give a shit about that. I just want to help you, and I think your dad might be able to do that. You need people around you. More people than just me. You need Darren and my mom. You need Stephanie and your other friends. This fight isn’t going to be easy. You’ll need support.”
“Why?” Tara snapped. “So everyone can watch me die?”
Her words cut through my chest like a knife. I took another step back and shook my head slowly. How could she even say that?