It's Complicated: A Reservations Story

Fire licked its way up Beckett’s spine, turning his desire into anger and sending it shooting through the stratosphere. What he wouldn’t give to find the motherfucker who did that to Julian. The person who had caused so much damage, both mentally and physically, to that beautiful man.

Beckett fisted his hand as his body tightened with rage. Goddamn, Beckett didn’t like getting so angry. Every fucking day Beckett made a solid effort to be positive and happy in his life, but right now, he promised himself if he ever got the chance, the fucker who hurt Julian would hurt in return. Such an oath helped take the edge off the intensity of his mounting fury.

He took a deep cleansing breath, clearing his erratic thoughts. Julian had been through enough; he didn’t want to freak him out any further.

“I’m gonna be honest, there aren’t too many men who’ve turned away from me like you did,” Julian said from the threshold of his bedroom door. Beckett kept his gaze averted, not sure he could handle another fully nude display.

“It wasn’t easy,” Beckett replied truthfully, hearing the desperate roughness of his voice.

“You’ve got that I’m-a-gentleman thing down.” Julian’s voice faded back into the bedroom. “I have a crazy idea. What about I buy your dinner tonight?”

Beckett had to swallow the lump in his throat as the back of his head hit the wall before he corralled his scattered thoughts. “Yeah. Dinner. Okay. Don’t you have to work tonight?”

“Not really the response I expected,” Julian said, peeking back around the corner. Beckett allowed himself a look at Julian. This time, he caught the guarded hesitancy in Julian’s expression. “Be honest. Did you see something you didn’t like? We’re good if you’d rather take off.”

The insecurity from such a vibrant man confirmed his earlier thoughts. If Beckett ever got the chance, he would destroy with his bare hands the motherfucker who’d hurt Julian. Julian was beautiful, and nothing Beckett saw would make him feel any differently.

He took a deep breath and answered on the exhale. “I haven’t been shy in pursuing you. Seeing you in the shower only confirmed what I’ve known all along. You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.” Beckett shook his head as the truth tumbled from his lips. “Who could have thought you’d be any more gorgeous out of your clothes than you are in them?” He dropped his head hard against the wall, wanting to knock away the images flashing through his brain. “I’m so fucked over you, Julian.”

Julian almost preened under the praise. Holy hell, Julian moved enough to have his bare chest exposed, his silky robe lapel dropping open. Beckett closed his eyes, praying Julian wasn’t truly the exhibitionist he proclaimed himself to be.

“I’m transitioning out of my current position to begin training for general manager. You could help me celebrate by staying in and watching something on that big ol’ screen I haven’t turned on since I’ve been here.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever known you to take a day off,” Beckett managed, unsure if committing to being alone with Julian was a good idea.

Thankfully, Julian ducked back behind the door and spoke louder as he moved about the bedroom. “Thursdays are my scheduled days off, but I never take off. If you’d rather keep your reservation, we’re good. I can go in.”

This time, Julian didn’t sound pained. It relieved Beckett.

“I’m into staying in tonight,” he said, and finally pushed off the wall, glad his feet held him upright. “I have a change of clothes in the truck…”

“Be prepared. Boy Scout rule number one,” Julian called out mockingly, back to his normal self. Beckett grinned, at ease again. “You can shower if you want. I’ll call the restaurant and order us something to be delivered. Sound good?”

“Perfect,” Beckett answered and started for his truck. Maybe he could regroup before he got back to the condo.

The warmth and comfort of being held by another was finally seeping through Julian’s well-constructed barriers. No matter how indifferent he acted, having Beckett’s muscular arms around him while they lay sprawled out on top of his oversized sofa, watching Netflix, was an important step in the right direction for his mental health. Julian wouldn’t ever admit it out loud, but he enjoyed the domesticated bliss he was feeling at the moment.

His head lay cushioned on Beckett’s thick shoulder and chest. He slowly trailed his palm down Beckett’s soft T-shirt as he stared at the screen, feigning interest in whatever show they’d chosen. Beckett’s other brawny arm was pushed behind his head, keeping him at an angle to better see the television.

The arm wrapped around Julian tightened its hold. A show of appreciation for his simple caress. Beckett’s consideration ran so deep. He never failed to show Julian exactly how thankful he was to be there with him. How did that make him feel so damn special?