No…
Several heart-stopping seconds later, Beckett finally looped a single arm around Julian’s waist. When Julian pulled back enough to see Beckett’s face, confusion, sorrow, and pain marred that strong brow.
Beckett seemed lost to what was happening. Julian had been right about one thing; he didn’t deserve someone this good.
Marc slipped out of the hotel room, whispering quietly as he went, “I’ll be right outside the door.”
“What’s happened, Julian?” Beckett carefully lifted his tentative fingers to Julian’s upturned face, moving several strands of hair off his forehead. “Tell me everything.”
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I should have never doubted what was happening between us. It was insane for me to come here. I’m nowhere near the man I used to be.” Julian laughed, but there was no humor in it. “I fought to get back to who I used to be, but I’ve evolved from that person. I didn’t understand that before tonight. I don’t want what I thought I did. Tell me I didn’t ruin everything for us.” Julian wasn’t above begging Beckett to let him turn back time to their happier days together.
“You had to give yourself a chance…” Beckett didn’t finish his sentence. Julian could see the gears in Beckett’s mind trying to catch up.
He knew Beckett had cared for him. Hopefully, Beckett hadn’t lost the feeling in just a few days. Julian rose to his tiptoes, skimming his lips over Beckett’s mouth. Julian searched Beckett’s expressive gaze as he faced the beginning of his new life, head-on.
“I did have to try, and I hurt you in the process. I’m so sorry. I cherish you; I love you, Beckett. I’m the luckiest guy in the world to have found you, and I almost threw it all away. Tell me I’m not too late.” Julian recognized the begging tone and the way he rambled, but he couldn’t stop until he made Beckett see the truth. “If you give me a second chance, we’ll do it your way. Commitment. A relationship. I don’t want children, but then again, maybe I do if you do. I don’t know. We’ll figure it out—”
Beckett’s lips were on his in an instant, his tongue plunging forward, dominating Julian in the hottest, most promising kiss of his life. Both of Beckett’s muscular arms locked around his body, tugging him flush against Beckett’s broad chest. The invisible distance between them instantly vanished.
Julian wrapped his arms around Beckett’s neck, holding on tightly, as relief eased all the tension Julian had held on to. Beckett wouldn’t kiss him as if his life depended on their intimacy if he didn’t see their future as clearly as Julian.
Beckett devoured Julian’s mouth. He had no real idea what the fuck was going on, but it didn’t stop the most intimate, soul-searing kiss of his life. The chaos Beckett had expected to walk into had instantly shifted to a declaration from the heart and words Beckett had longed to hear. I love you.
He yearned for it to be the truth. He’d wished for that kind of commitment from Julian. But Beckett found himself holding back, if only a tiny bit. Julian had given him whiplash. What if this moment, this beautiful moment, declaring his intention for commitment, had been spurred on by the fear of whatever memories Julian had uncovered?
Julian climbed up his body. Beckett gripped Julian’s thighs while those sexy legs locked around his waist. He held Julian as the crazy guy lifted above Beckett’s face, making his head tilt backward to continue the ravishing kiss. Julian’s palms pressed to Beckett’s cheeks, angling his head as Julian dove into the farthest recesses of Beckett’s mouth.
Holy hell. If kisses spoke, this one was driving every one of Julian’s words into action, sealing their fate together.
Self-preservation made Beckett remember Julian was on the edge of an awful situation.
Beckett carefully pulled back from the kiss. Julian’s mouth followed him, his hands like vises on Beckett’s cheeks, tugging him back to the kiss.
“Julian…please.”
“What, Beck?” Julian’s tongue swept forward. Beckett forced the kiss to stay light until a frustrated Julian reared back, staying within inches of Beckett’s face. “What’s wrong?”
“Julian.” Beckett’s head told him to give this time, but his hands tighten their grip, keeping Julian’s hard cock pressed into his lower belly. “How can we move forward until we get your deal resolved?”
Julian’s face paled, his legs pushed against Beckett’s hold. It was damn hard for Beckett to let Julian go.
“It’s too late,” Julian said with disappointed finality and started to move away. Beckett’s sense of reason was lost to his desperation of making Julian happy at any cost.
He tightened his grip around Julian’s upper arm. “Of course, it’s not too late, but you’ve identified your attacker. We need to take this in steps. You’ve been through a lot tonight. Tell me what happened?”
Julian’s nimble fingers raked through the silky strands of his hair. Beckett had never seen that from him before. When Julian stepped away, Beckett released him. Then watched as he headed for one of the two full-size beds.