As they hold me during the night, we hardly even sleep. It’s something else. I have gotten them to open up and tell me their darkest secrets. We stay up talking about our planets in great detail.
And then we go deeper.
I speak about love, about the letdown I’ve felt my entire life. I talk to them about my complacency.
I even tell them about Ryan.
I took a job I didn’t want. I suppressed my talents for years, simply because I wanted a decent paycheck. I was just trying to survive like anybody else. And that’s what makes it so sad. I know that so many other humans have it worse than I do.
Was it a mistake to leave? Am I giving up on my people by taking the easy way out?
For the first time in ages, I feel selfish.
“Well, this Ryan guy sounds like a fucking idiot,” Lök says.
“He is a man? A grown adult?” Vraik asks.
It makes me laugh, but then I get to the part about my mother. My smile fades, and I can’t even finish my sentences. I try not tear up because I know it doesn’t help to dwell on unfinished business. Of course, I do, regardless.
They hold me. They listen. They tell me it’s going to be okay, that they’ll make it all better.
Maybe.
Or maybe that’s just life. Maybe we have to let things go, whether we want to or not.
I’m still unsure.
“She must love you,” Rekker says. His hot breath circles around my ear. “She just doesn’t know how to express it.”
“Yea,” I murmur. “Probably.”
But I still don’t believe it. I still blame myself for what happened. And I’m not sure there’s any way to change that.
Here, I can fall into their love and adoration. But I still wonder if I’m dreaming. I can’t stop asking myself, “When will this fall apart?”
In the morning, my smile is still plastered across my face. I’m smiling so large I probably look like one of those demented clowns. Well, color me surprised. My grin is not all that’s plastered on me.
Uh, yeah. I need a shower.
My alien brutes are snoring away, arms heavily suffocating my ribcage and waist. Carefully, I nudge away from the pack and stand, stretching my limbs.
Today is going to be a good day. I just know it. The feeling reverberates through my bones.
I discovered love on a distant planet. Isn’t that what so many girls dream of finding?
Although the fertility chamber is dark, a sliver of light penetrates the staircase up to the top floor. Without thinking, I walk in that direction. Yawning, I cover my eyes as the sun turns brighter.
Within seconds, I’m upstairs. I think back to when Akron left for the mines. That feels like ages ago. Yet, it just happened.
There is a mound of handpicked flowers, alongside a pendant. They rest on a black cape. I recognize the pendant as Vraik’s necklace.
These are gifts from the alphas. They must have snuck out after I fell asleep.
I stoop and smell the flowers. A torrent of aroma hits my senses. They smell even better than the flowers from Earth.
I place the necklace around my neck.
Gently folding the flowers in the cape, I make sure everything is safe to carry, and I continue onward. My feet carry me outside, where the sun blazes hard above.