“Koa!” Through the blackness clouding my vision, I realize Mercy is pulling my arm. She’s jumping up and down beside me, jerking it. “Koa! STOP!!!”
Suddenly, I realize where we are and what I’m doing. My death grip on Jim’s throat relaxes, and I let him go. He crumples to the floor, and I step back, rubbing my face with my hands.
“Jim…” I’m shaken, and our friend is on the floor gasping for air. “I’m sorry, man. I don’t know what came over me.”
Dropping to a knee, I reach for his arm. He instinctively rears back, putting up an elbow to block me. “Stay back, bro!”
He’s genuinely terrified, and shame burns in my chest. It’s been a long time since I’ve lost control that way. All my years of anger management seem to have left me in one simple threat to Mercy.
Rising slowly, I back toward the juice bar, wondering if I should tender my resignation now or wait to be fired.
Andy sticks his head out. “Why don’t you take the afternoon off,” is all he says before heading back to his office, leaving Mercy and me to figure out what to do next.
Her palms are gentle against my biceps. I blink down to her blue eyes, and she’s looking at me with such warmth. I can see she’s holding back words. I’m just the opposite. I have no words for what I did, but I agree with Andy.
“I’d better take the afternoon off.”
“Okay.” Her voice is soft, and holding my forearm, as she rises on her toes to kiss my cheek.
Our eyes meet again, and that feeling is back, that overwhelming protectiveness. Nothing hurts Mercy. Yeah, I need to get out of here.
I spend the rest of the day wandering the streets, looking in shop windows and trying to get my bearings on how I’m changing and what I’m going to do about it. I’ve got to figure out what that unknown evil is lurking around Mercy’s house. I’ve got to settle that problem, and then I really should get back on the road.
My feelings for Mercy are getting out of control. I don’t understand them, and I can’t rationalize them away. I stole her blood, as if I have a right to be inside her mind. I’ve allowed myself to get too attached to her when I don’t have anything to offer her at this point.
She’s a beautiful, high-class shifter, and I’m a banished rogue. I have to reestablish myself before I can even think about approaching her seriously. As it stands, I can’t even buy her dinner.
It’s sunset when I’m walking back to the garage apartment. Thinking about Mercy, I realize I’m so pathetic, I don’t even have a phone to text or call her. Briefly, I think of walking back to the discount store and picking up a burner when I see Jim waiting in Doris’s driveway.
I pause at the street, but he strides forward, hands raised. “Dude, I totally get it.” He stops right in front of me. “If a big dude like me was hurting Sally that way, I’d do the same thing you did.”
My shoulders relax and I shake my head. “Jim, I’m really sorry, man. I just snapped.”
“Don’t even apologize, bro. Bygones.”
“I’m not sure it’s bygones.”
“Oh, it’s bygones. I put my hands on your woman, and then I didn’t stop when she asked me to stop. It was a total kick-ass offense.”
“You weren’t doing anything wrong. You’re supposed to work out these scenarios for the class. I know you’d never hurt Mercy.”
Jim nods vigorously. “Right, but at the same time, I don’t have to watch my lady being attacked by me. At least I know Mercy’s going to kick my ass when I’m doing it. That makes it okay.”
I’m not going to win this argument. I acted irrationally, but Jim seems ready and willing to let me off the hook for it. I grasp his shoulder hard, pulling him in for a solid man-hug.
“I know you’re her friend.”
When I release him, he seems a little embarrassed. “I like Mercy a lot. I’d hate my job if I wasn’t helping those girls stay safe.
“You’re a good guy.” I nod. “I’ll miss you when I leave here.”
He goes quiet a moment, eyes thoughtful. “I didn’t know you were leaving, bro. I’m sorry to hear that.”
Awkwardness fills the space. I can’t seem to get it right with Jim today. “It probably won’t be for a little while. At least a week or so.”
He nods and turns, heading slowly back towards Doris’s place, shoulders slumped. “Wow. I’m kind of bummed out now.”
I watch him go inside then I glance up at the growing twilight. I haven’t seen Mercy since early afternoon, and I’m jonesing for a hit off her beautiful lips.