Under the Stars

“It’s okay,” I whisper, kissing her temple, smoothing back her hair.

She’s not crying. Her body trembles and her breathing is shallow, and I know she’s close to the edge. As long as I’ve known her, it’s her one weakness, her body’s involuntary defense against the onslaught of memory.

“Listen to me,” I speak softly in her ear, wrapping her in my arms. “It’s over. It was over years ago. I’ve got you. I’ll keep you safe now. Always. I promise.”

Another shudder moves through her, and I hug her tighter to my chest. My hand covers the back of her head, and I hold her forehead steady against my neck, skin against skin.

“I was so afraid,” she says barely above a whisper. “He was going to hurt me again. He was going to hurt Molly. It was never going to stop—”

“I know.” Rubbing my hands up and down her back, I soothe away the past. “I know why you did it. You had no choice.”

“You were gone… I’d lost you.” She takes a shuddering breath. “Roland said to live with it. He said Guy would grow tired of me and move on to someone new.”

Her voice is faint, as if she’s still there, caught in that dark place and struggling to break free.

“You couldn’t do that. You could never let that happen again.”

Her chin dips, and her hands tighten on my arms. She puts her feet under her, and I help her stand, help her find her footing. For a moment, she holds my arms, her head still bowed, but I can see she’s rallying. Another breath, another shake of her head.

“I didn’t have a choice,” she says, her voice growing stronger. She steps back from me, and there she is. She’s with us again, determined to survive. It’s another reason I love her, another reason I’ll never let her fight alone.

Turning to Molly, Lara meets her head-on. “What happened in that room wasn’t about revenge. It wasn’t cold or calculated.”

“You’re right.” Molly’s expression is angry. “It was spontaneous and fierce. It was vengeance. It was what I do.”

Lara shakes her head no, wrapping her arms around her waist. My lips tighten, and while I know she’s had her own share of trauma, I don’t like how Molly drives her.

“If I hadn’t stopped Guy, he would’ve gone on abusing me… and you… and the next girl… or boy. Just like he abused Roland before us.”

Silence falls on the room, and we’re momentarily derailed. Molly’s hyper-controlled exterior falters and her lips part. Lara dropped a bomb neither of us saw coming.

“Roland?” Molly’s response is hushed.

“It’s not my place to tell his story. He’s as much a victim of this as you and I. It’s why he took care of us…”

“Then I’m doing this for him, too.” Molly’s voice grows louder, stronger. “If Gavin would sacrifice him, you, the ones he claimed to care about… He’s a bastard. A worthless bastard who deserves to die.”

“He never cared about me. It’s like I told you then. We were always very secondary to him.”

Molly paces the room, silver hair fanning over her shoulders. Her arms remain crossed, and her slim brow is furrowed. “I’m so close to taking him down. So close…”

“Can we get back to the recordings?” Jillian is on my mind, and I don’t want to be away from her longer than necessary. “Is this the only one you found? Are there more?”

She stops moving. “It was my first hit after three days of searching.” Moving to the computer, she drops into the black desk chair. “It’s not as easy to find things as it sounds. I used all sorts of search terms. It’s possible he’s deleting the files.”

Ice filters down my spine. It’s what I feared the most—losing evidence to show Lara acted in self-defense. “Can he delete them once they’re on the web? I thought nothing ever died on the Internet.”

“He can delete them. If he knows how to hide them, he knows how to get rid of them.”

My muscles tense, and I look from her to the computer. “Show me what you’ve done. We have to find the evidence before it’s too late.”

“The video of my rape?” Her blue eyes are cold, her distance a wall.

“Molly…” Lara’s voice is a whispered plea.

“I don’t know what happened to you,” she says, looking at Lara. “I wasn’t there, and again, no one bothered to tell me the truth—”

“Does it help that they’re all close in time?” Lara cuts her off. “Molly’s was first, then Mark… then me.”