By Sin I Rise: Part Two (Sins of the Fathers 2)
Page 39
“That’s bullshit, and you know it. That’s nothing you have to be ashamed for. If anyone should be ashamed, then it’s me because I was unable to protect you. I’ll forever hate myself for that.”
He kissed the top of my head. Such a small gesture, but it radiated through my entire body, making me feel loved and validated.
“I know I shouldn’t feel this way, but I just can’t shake it. I feel like people finally have something they can use against me, something that’ll hurt me.”
“Only if you let them. Nobody can hurt you with thoughts or words if you don’t let them. Channel your inner queen, Marcella, and make them bow.”
I couldn’t help but laugh against his skin. Maddox’s familiar scent flooded my nose. That and his words lifted the weight off my heart. I pressed a soft kiss against his skin.
His hold on my neck tightened briefly. “Don’t give me ideas. You don’t know what your lips are doing to me,” Maddox rumbled. Hearing his deep, sexy voice, my own body reacted with a wave of heat.
I tilted my head up to catch his mouth for a kiss, needing to feel him closer. My tongue teased his lips and Maddox immediately took me up on the invitation and deepened the kiss. We kissed like that for a long time, Maddox’s warm hands stroking up and down my back, and soon the pulsing between my thighs became almost unbearable. I wanted to be with him, find comfort in his body. I didn’t want to take it slow, even if that was what my brain told me to do. My heart and body had a mind of their own.
Our eyes met and Maddox pulled back with a groan. “You’re giving me ideas, Snow White.” I glanced at the growing bulge in his pants and smiled.
My eyes darted to the French doors where I could still see the back of Gianna’s head. With a sigh, I took a step back from Maddox. “We can’t.”
“I definitely can,” Maddox said, shifting his erection in his pants.
I laughed. “I don’t doubt it.”
Maddox leaned down, his voice dripping with desire. “What about you, Snow White? Are you as excited about our reunion as I am?”
I was. Embarrassingly so. I gave him a teasing smile instead of an answer. But Gianna caught my eyes in that moment, pointing at her watch and then at her purse.
The test.
I swallowed. “There’s something else I have to discuss with you.”
“Okay,” Maddox said slowly. “Nothing good, I assume. Does your family want to kill me again?”
“Not today,” I said with a shrug. I worried my lower lip. “I asked Gianna to buy a pregnancy test for me.”
Maddox took a step back, his eyes growing huge. “Holy shit.” He glanced outside. “Holy shit.”
“That’s all you have to say?”
“You’re dropping this on me as if this was nothing when it’s a huge ass deal,” he murmured.
“It’s probably nothing. I’m just being extra cautious because I didn’t get my period yesterday and we never used protection.”
“Fuck, I was such a stupid asshole.”
“We both should have known better.”
He shook his head. “I always used protection until you.” He groaned, running a hand through his hair, tousling it completely. “Fuck. You realize your old man is going to cut off my balls and stuff them in my mouth so I’ll choke on them.”
I couldn’t deny it. Dad would completely lose it if I was pregnant with Maddox’s child.
Maddox tilted his head, looking aghast. “How can this not be the thing that worries you most right now?”
I pursed my lips. “I want kids. Of course not now. But even if I got pregnant unplanned, I’d be fine. I’d love the baby and my family would support me.” I searched his eyes. “You wouldn’t have to worry about it.”
Maddox slid his arm around my waist. “Let me be clear. I sure as fuck would worry about it and take care of it and you. I never thought about having kids and definitely not now, but if I put a baby inside of you, then I’m going to be a father to it, and I’ll help you raise it.” He shook his head in shock again. “Holy shit. Don’t take this the wrong way, but I hope you’re not pregnant. I want us to figure us out first.”
“You’re right. I feel the same way.” I was glad that Maddox wanted to take care of the baby. If he had refused to even consider the possibility of taking care of it, he wouldn’t have been the right man for me. “I want my family to accept you before we grow our own family.”
I blushed. We were still too early in our relationship to consider kids but I wanted kids and I wanted to be with Maddox.
“I think we need to sit down and talk, really talk about how we can make this, make us, work,” I said quietly.