My Summer in Seoul

“Eyyy,” a voice sounded. “Wake up.” Something tapped my shoulder.

I jolted away. “Sorry, sorry.” I rubbed my eyes. “What time is it?”

“Everyone’s already in bed.” It was Kai. “Rae said to let you sleep out here, but I figured you’d be starving.”

My stomach grumbled. He handed me a box of food. “I wasn’t sure if you even liked this, but Rae said you’d be okay with bulgogi and japchae.”

“I have no idea”—my voice cracked, so I cleared my throat—“what you just said, but it smells amazing so thank you.” I hadn’t been exposed to Korean food a ton and was so happy that they were giving me more options which just seemed fun on top of all the sadness I’d been experiencing. It was a welcome distraction. One I really needed.

I took the two plastic containers then looked up when he handed me chopsticks with amusement.

I snatched them away from him. “I know how to use chopsticks. I’m not totally useless.”

He leaned back. “Didn’t say you were.”

“Why aren’t you sleeping?” I asked, digging into the meat.

He shrugged. “I was texting Solia.”

I nearly choked on the beef, not expecting his honesty. “And? How did that go?”

“She won’t date me.”

I laughed. “Oh wait, you’re serious?”

“She’s scared of my parents.”

“Well, are your parents scary?”

The look he gave me said hell yes, they’re scary. “Let’s just say they own two airlines, five large corporations, and probably made the chopsticks you’re using.”

“Ah.” I gulped down some noodles. “So basically, your rich family is intimidating. She doesn’t think they’d approve?”

He shrugged. “They don’t approve of me being an idol, yet here I am, proving them wrong. I just wish she was… braver.”

I sighed. “You can’t force someone to be something they aren’t. You can only stand by their side, meet them where they’re at.”

He ran a hand through his long hair—it wasn’t in a man bun but resting against his shoulders; I’d never seen him look so relaxed. He looked like a hero from a gothic novel. “I guess.”

“Give her time,” I suggested. “She’s not just dealing with your family being rich and scary—she’s also dealing with the fact that you’re Kai from SWT.”

“I am a pretty big deal,” he added.

“The biggest,” I agreed, taking another bite.

Kai laughed and reached over, stealing a piece of beef. “You’re not so bad yourself, you know?”

“Was that a compliment?”

“You hold your chopsticks wrong.”

I stuck out my tongue and jerked my food away. “Then no beef for you.”

“I’m sooorryyy!” He reached for the food and popped another piece of beef into his mouth. “Why does yours taste better?”

I knew he wasn’t flirting; he liked Solia.

But Lucas, who had just walked into the room, clearly didn’t care about that.

“You should be in bed,” he barked.

“Yeah.” Kai stood.

“Not you.” Lucas sneered. “Her, the girl who works for us and shouldn’t get so comfortable hanging out at midnight with the members.”

How had I forgotten this side of him?

The mean side that pushed everyone and everything away.

I’d been so distracted by my own feelings, I’d forgotten.

Shaking, I stood and closed the container, no longer hungry. “Th-thanks for waking me up, Kai. Lucas is right. I’ll go to bed.”

I quickly put the food in the fridge and walked past Lucas, shutting my bedroom door behind me, and sliding to the floor, my breath coming out in a slow, panicky way that made me feel like I was having an anxiety attack.

Breathe.

In.

Out.

Breathe.

My phone went off in my hand, and I stared at the screen as more hot tears slid down my cheeks.

Lucas: Guess Rae really will get my sloppy seconds…

Me: That’s complete bullshit and rude, and you know it.

Lucas: It is what it is, right? I mean, you’ve been stringing us both along. Tell me I’m wrong.

Me: Um, you are wrong. Are you serious? I thought you at least got me a bit, that you knew me, I guess not. I guess you’re like every other guy out there, assuming…

Lucas: Assuming?

Me: I’m going to bed. You should sleep too. You have a heavy schedule, remember? I’m just the intern. The help. Working for you, the talent. Go. Run along. I’ll be here like I always am even if my feelings are hurt, or I’m offended, you know what? Go. I’m done here.

Lucas: Grace, it’s not… I mean… just it’s not like you think, it’s—

Me: Doesn’t matter. Do your job. I’ll do mine and stop letting my heart get hurt in the process. Good night.

I’d be surprised if my eyes would even close that night.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Love Shot

Grace

My feelings didn’t matter today.

Today they were on the comeback stage.

And I was nervous as hell, as much as I wanted to slap Lucas across his perfect face—I knew that this was important. My texts with Lucas made me want to vomit, but the point was, I said my piece, he kind of said his, and it was what it was. I mean, I couldn’t fix it. He hurt me, I hurt him somehow, it just… was a thing. I promised myself I’d work my ass off, take a few deep breaths and just make it work.