Shelter (Heroes of Big Sky 2)

My eyes fill again. Have I ever felt so important, so vital to another person?

No.

And that’s what scares me and also fills me with joy.

“Wow.”

His lips tip up into a smile. “Yeah. Wow.”

“The thing is, I—” I lick my lips. “I love you, too.”

“I know.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Oh, really?”

“I figure that’s the only thing that would make you want to run for the hills.”

I chuckle. “Just because you kept me here with your sexy ways doesn’t mean I’m not still scared, you know.”

“Oh, I’m terrified,” he says casually and pulls me against him for a snuggle. “But the way I like to think of it, we’ll just figure it out as we go. You don’t have a roadmap because there isn’t one, Rem.”

“So, we just wing it?”

“I guess so.”

“Well, that’s just stupid. I’m a planner, Seth.”

“Says the woman who’s been living by the seat of her pants in a van for several months.”

I narrow my eyes. “But I planned it.”

“You planned the spontaneity?”

“Yes. Sort of. Stop confusing me.”

He laughs and rolls me onto my back, then kisses me long and slow in the way I’ve come to love so much.

Chapter 14

~Seth~

“I’ll make you something to eat.” Mom smiles and ruffles my hair. I’ve gotten used to letting her touch me whenever she wants without flinching or moving away. I’m safe here at our ranch in Montana, and Mom makes me stuff to eat anytime I want. I can ask for food and actually get it.

And I’m hungry now.

“Can I have a sandwich?”

“Sure, do you want some chips, too?”

I grin at her. “Yeah. And maybe you can cut it in that cool way that you do.”

The best thing my dad ever did was marry Jillian. And now that he’s home, and we’re a family, things aren’t bad. My other mom lied to me and made me believe that my dad doesn’t love me.

But that’s not true.

I turn to watch the TV, but suddenly, everything is different. I’m not in the ranch house. This is the gross old apartment in Texas.

“You think you can just be lazy?”

I spin and freeze in fear when Kensie, my other mom, sneers at me.

“I’m just hungry.”

“You’re always hungry. You’re nothing but a pain in my ass. No wonder your dad left and didn’t look back. Just look at you. You’re worthless.”

No, I’m not.

I want to yell at her that I’m not worthless, but if I talk back, it’ll only get worse.

“Yes, ma’am.” I lower my head and look at the floor. Why am I here? Where’s the ranch? Where’s Jillian?

“You can go hungry, you little shit. I’m not wasting my hard-earned money on food for you.”

She has sex with men in exchange for money. Sometimes, she even forgets I’m here in the room with her when she does it. It makes my tummy hurt, and I want to run away so I don’t have to see it anymore.

And, sometimes, it’s worse than that. Sometimes, she lets the men do things to me. That’s when it’s worst of all. But it’s over. I’m at the ranch.

Where is the ranch?

“Why don’t you let me have a go at him?”

No. Oh God, no.

I shake my head vigorously as beefy, mean hands grab at me.

“Don’t you tell me no,” Kensie says. Her breath stinks. It smells like cigarettes and beer. “You be nice, you hear me?”

“I don’t want to.” I whimper. “Please, I don’t want to.”

“Seth.”

I jump out of the bed and run for the bathroom, splash cold water on my face, and will the nightmare to dissipate.

Jesus. Jesus Christ, this hasn’t happened in years. My stomach roils, and I’m dizzy.

And suddenly so damn hungry.

I know it’s all in my head, but I always wake from these dreams feeling hungrier than ever.

“Seth.”

I lift my gaze and meet Remi’s in the mirror.

“I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not.” She steps to me and tentatively lays her hand on my arm. “Honey, you’re not okay.”

Without thinking, I pull her against me and bury my nose in her hair, breathing her in. Her sweet smell, her warmth, her goodness. I soak her in and cling to her as she pushes the sickness out of me.

“Come on,” she urges and leads me back to the bed. “Let’s just breathe for a minute.”

“I’m fine. I’ll be okay.”

“I know you will, but that was a hell of a nightmare. You were thrashing and fighting.”

I look down at her for the first time and see a bruise on her shoulder. “Jesus, what did I do to you?”

“You just pushed me aside when I tried to touch you. It’s my own fault. I know better than to do that.”

“Oh my God.” I back away from her, not touching her at all. “I hurt you.”

“Hey, look at me, Seth. Damn it, look at me.”

My eyes meet hers.

“I’m fine. I just bruise easily, that’s all. You didn’t hurt me.”