There’s just no way.
CHAPTER 14
Ladd
It took seven and a half hours to get from Pittsburgh to Miami. After I packed my bag, I spent some time with Ethan explaining what was going on. I’m transparent with my kid about what I do for a living, but I only give him age-appropriate information. I also took some time with Britney, thanking her profusely for stepping in to help. I know she’s got a lot on her plate with her impending delivery, but I would not want to leave Ethan with anyone else. I have protective measures set up with Jameson to watch over them both, which will allow me to concentrate on Mejia.
We made it to the Pittsburgh Airport without delay, and it took another hour to board the private jet and get in the air to Miami. We landed, picked up a rental car, and checked into a hotel. Tomorrow we’ll leave bright and early for the two-and-a-half-hour flight to San Salvador.
There should be absolutely no way in hell for Newman or Mejia to know that Greer and I are headed there. It’s near to impossible for them to know we’re in Miami right now, unless they’ve somehow managed to track us magically. We’re comfortable with separate hotel rooms, and that is probably for the best. While I still have conflicted emotions raging through me regarding Greer, sharing a hotel room with her would be disastrous. There’s no way I would be able to look at a bed with her in proximity and not have my thoughts go in a very dirty direction.
Such a mistake to have given in to our desires earlier this week. If my moral fiber were stronger, I would’ve been able to walk away and not have given her a second thought. But my resolve was nonexistent the minute she stepped into my arms, and there was no choice but to fuck her the minute we kissed.
To complicate matters, I’ve learned that Greer tried to look me up ten years ago. Now my head is all kinds of fucked up.
I have no clue why she came to see me. Was it mere curiosity?
Would my life have changed had she gotten out of the damn car and approached?
I would’ve never left Britney… not with her pregnant with Ethan and us recently married. No matter how much I’d loved Greer in the past, my loyalty was to Britney. But maybe she would’ve told me something that would’ve made it better.
Maybe she would have given me a reason to forgive her.
And all it would take for me to know the answer is to knock on the adjoining door between our rooms and ask her.
But I don’t.
I’m still too mired in old bitterness, suffocating under a layer of confusion, because now that she’s back in my life, all those memories and feelings are welling up inside me.
It’s too easy to remember how much my heart would leap when I would see her. Or how my body would react at the thought of touching her. The woman had such power over me, but it’s not something I’m ashamed of. I had the same power over her.
The thing that bothers me on such a deep level is that since she’s come back into my life, she has power over me again. My body still reacts when I think of touching her, and my heart trips when she walks into a room. And I’m trying really hard to make all that go away.
I think back to the last time I saw her, remember how painful it was for both of us. I choose now, like I did all those years ago, to blame her for it entirely. Makes it easier to move on.
Greer had just told me a corny joke and she roared with laughter. It was so stupid, it would’ve never even drawn a chuckle from me. But her sheer delight in being a dork is what got to me. It was her laughter at herself that had me laughing right along with her as we rolled amidst a tangle of sheets.
Greer lifted her hand to brush hair out of her face, and the diamond ring I bought her three days after she’d accepted my proposal winked at me. It looked good sitting on her slim finger, although we would have to tuck it away in a safe deposit box whenever her next mission came about.
I knew the diamond would look even better with a wedding band beside it, and the ceremony was in four short days.
We came to San Diego as a sort of pre-wedding vacation, although we’d planned a short honeymoon for after the ceremony. The wedding would be held in Ramona where her parents lived, but we declined their invitation to stay in their home because frankly, our lovemaking could be boisterous and noisy.