For a brief moment in time, none of this felt real. I didn’t feel desolate at the bottom of the cliffs, in the company of people who wanted me dead, in the cold where winter always prevailed. It felt like I was home—sharing my bed with a man who’d earned me.
But then my eyes opened, and it all came back.
Fully dressed, he sat at the edge of the bed, his cloak secured in place. He watched the fire, his face back to its usual hardness. “Fire will last until morning. I threw on more logs.”
“Alright.”
He pulled his boots on to his feet then stood up.
“Thank you.”
He stilled as he faced the door, his cape reaching the floor behind him.
“I’d rather it be you…than anyone else.”
ELEVEN
Huntley
At the head of the table, she’d already eaten her meager meal, only eating the bare minimum so her subjects would have enough. The rest of the food was for me, but I wasn’t hungry, knowing this wasn’t the end of it.
Lila entered the cabin, came to my mother’s side, and whispered in her ear.
“Thank you, Lila.” Mother grabbed her ale and took a drink.
Lila left the cabin.
Now it was just us again.
After a minute of silence, she broke it. “You did as I asked.”
I watched the fire, feeling a lot of different things. I was an asshole for fucking Ivory because I was ordered to, and I was an even bigger asshole for enjoying every second of it. It was all kinds of fucked up. “I hope this revenge is suitable to you.”
“Depends.” She grabbed the bottle and refilled her glass. “How was it?”
My head snapped in her direction, shocked that she’d asked.
She took a drink, not the least bit ashamed. “Well?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Did she cry?”
When my dick was too big for her mouth. When she came the second time.
“Did she beg?”
She begged me to fuck her. “Mother—”
“Maybe I should have just watched.”
This wasn’t the woman who raised me. This wasn’t the woman who commanded me. I’d lived the same trauma she did, but my response was nowhere near the same. “It’s done. Let’s move on.”
“I didn’t cry—”
“She cried the entire way through. She begged me to stop. I had to tie her down.” Was that enough?
Obviously, it was because she gave a quick grin before she took a drink. “Good.”
The next morning, I did my rounds at the outpost, making sure everyone was exactly where they should be. Attacks were always unexpected, so we had to be prepared for anything and everything. Even an alliance between the Teeth and the yetis, though that would never happen.
Ian appeared at my side, half an inch shorter. “Did the deed, huh?”
I looked through the trees and at the frozen tundra.
It started off as a tease, but once he read my mood, he stopped. “It’s over, so just forget about it.”
“I’m trying.”
“I’m glad she didn’t ask me.”
It had to be me, thankfully.
“When are you leaving?”
“Not for a while. Scouts say it’s too dangerous right now.”
“Who are you bringing with you?”
“Nobody.”
Ian turned to me, his blue eyes just like mine. “You’re going to take her to the isles—a woman who hates your guts more than she did before—alone?”
“I’ll be fine.”
“You’ll be more fine if I come with you.”
“Ian, you have to stay here. We’ve both been gone too long. And the queen seems…a little unhinged.”
“Never seen her like that before.”
“Me neither.”
He faced forward again.
“You need to lead the men in my stead. We ran into a yeti out there. Camped outside the cave for most of the night, waiting for us.”
“Shit.”
“Things are getting worse out there.”
“But you know what they say…things will get worse before they get better.”
“That doesn’t apply to us, Ian. When have things ever gotten better down here?”
He stared ahead like he didn’t have the answer. “Just be careful with her, alright? I’ve seen what she can do, and after what happened last night, I’m sure she wants you dead. Don’t turn your back—not for a second.”
I entered the stone keep, passed the burning fire, and exchanged a look with Geralt.
Rage was on his face, like I’d wronged him somehow.
I halted my trek to hold his gaze, to make him remember his place, and after a few seconds, he did.
He looked to the entrance.
I entered the cabin to the sound of voices.
“You’d better clean my chamber pot good—because you’re eating dinner out of it.” I recognized my mother’s voice but not her words. I entered the dining room to see Ian sitting on my mother’s left, while Ivory sat in the corner, scrubbing the chamber pot with a dirty rag. Her hair was messy, like she’d been put to work the entire day without a break.
I stilled in the entryway, my eyes locking with hers.
She stared, her gaze just as blank as mine.