I nod, too. "What else is there if not for companionship?"
He flashes that same sly grin at me. "Oh, I can think of a few things."
I shudder. What's he doing to me? They're all just words. Words and bold looks. The way he looks at me makes me feel vulnerable and naked. I don't know how I feel about it. I like him. He's a pompous ass, but I like him.
"My life at boarding school was straight forward," he says.
"I’ve never been to boarding school," I say. "I grew up in Brooklyn. I don’t know what ‘straight forward’ is."
He nods, looking around the restaurant. "Well, I was shipped here to attend the best schools. My parents were far away. I lived a life that was independent from the start, and I made my way through school, learning what I had to learn and doing my own thing when I could."
I nod. "That sounds very brave."
"Sometimes, the only choice we have is to be brave."
This is true. I can't figure Thomas out. One moment, he's all confidence and charm, and I get the feeling he's only after one thing. The next, he's deep and personal, and he surprises me with things that I wouldn’t have thought to ask for myself.
"I’ve had more than enough of talking about me," Thomas says when the cheese platter and wine arrives. The waiter po
urs a small bit of wine into his glass. He swirls the glass the way you see them do in movies and lifts the glass to eye height. He tastes it, breathes in and looks thoughtful before he puts the glass down and nods at the waiter.
Adam pours more wine for Thomas, and he fills my glass halfway, too.
"That was intense," I say when Adam disappears.
"What?"
"I always thought wine was wine. You did the whole, tasting thing."
I place a cube of cheese in my mouth and chew.
Thomas chuckles. "Don’t tell them that if you ever get to France. You won’t be very popular." He reaches for the cheese as well. I sip the wine. It tastes amazing.
"Next time I go overseas, I’ll remember that," I say.
"Next time?" he asks. "You’ve been before?"
I shrug. "I traveled a little, yes. In the summer of my first year of college, I wanted to get away for a while. I never had a gap year between school and studying. I saved up all the money I could earn as a waitress and went to Germany for a week."
Thomas leans with his arms on the table. I notice his elbows are off the table. A sign of good breeding? Thomas is from a different class than I am. It shows in everything he does. He's refined, groomed, and trained in the art of being a gentleman. And yet, when he looks at me, there's nothing gentlemanly about it.
"Where would you like to go next?" he asks.
"Actually, Elanda sounds interesting."
I watch his face for reaction. He wears an expressionless mask.
"I wanted to go there when I was in Germany. I was close to the border, but I didn’t have the time."
Thomas nods. "There’s so much time left for you," he says. "You have your whole life ahead of you to do whatever you want and go wherever you want."
"You say it like you don’t have that luxury."
He smiles. "Oh, you know. Now that I’m finished with my studies, I feel like I’m tethered to the family business."
"It’s not what you want?"
He shrugs. "No child dreams of becoming a businessman. We all wanted to grow up to be heroes, right?"