He nods, but he doesn't look like he believes me. I feel bad but this–no sex until I'm in love–is important to me. Thomas doesn't say anything else. He kisses me on the cheek and leaves my apartment. I close the door behind him and turn around, leaning against it with my back.
It had been so close. Sleeping together had almost happened. Sex had been too easy, if I hadn’t stopped myself.
What does it mean? I nearly gave up the one thing I’ve wanted to save for whoever I was in love with. Had I gotten this close because I was starting to fall in love with him?
I cover my face with my hands.
How the hell am I supposed to know?
Thomas
A full day isn't enough to help me figure out what happened between Nicole and I. One moment, she'd been on board with the whole sex thing. My insides had been on fire. She’d made me wait for so long, but I finally felt like she opened up to me. The next, she kicked me out of the apartment like I was the last person on earth she wanted to be with.
How was I supposed to react? I had done everything right. After the first night she’d rejected me, I had taken a step back and given her some room before I made another move. We’d gone on a few more dates. I had taken the time to let her get to know me. I had listened to her conversation, even when I’d felt like she was rambling.
And now? She’s rejected me anyway.
Women never reject me, and I've already been rejected twice by Nicole. There is something about her that is frustrating. Something about her makes me want to keep coming back for more.
What's been said about forbidden fruit? Maybe it's because she always denies me that I want her so badly. You always want what you can’t have. In my life, there's not a lot of that. I always get what I want.
Maybe I have to slow things down even more. Most women are happy to sleep with me on the first date. Apparently, even the fourth is too soon for Nicole. Maybe she's checking me out.
I doubt her hesitation is because she has other options. Nicole doesn't seem like the kind of woman who messed around with multiple men at once. She focuses on her future rather than on the present. Her idea of fun is accumulating knowledge.
I still don't understand what's going through her mind, though. She seemed eager at the apartment. A little hesitant, but eager. And her touch. God, I nearly came the moment she gripped my cock. I’d been waiting for her touch since I’d met her. Having it happen for real was better than anything I could've imagined.
And her breasts? They're enough to drive a man crazy. Not too big, not too small. They fit perfectly into my hand. She’d been shy, at first. It had been refreshing to see a woman who was still modest about her nakedness. Something about her shyness turns me on even more.
It had been amazing until she decided to cover it all up again and get rid of me.
I groan and lie on my bed in the late afternoon sun, naked after a shower. My erection throbs painfully. Since I’d been with Nicole, it hadn’t really gone away. I'm starting to feel sexually frustrated. I need a release, and soon, if I'm going to feel like myself again.
I want her. I want her body, her sex, and her moaning in my ear. I need to eel her against me and see her face when I make her come. I want to take control of her body and show her what she's missing by rejecting me.
I rolled off the bed and get dressed. Jeans, a button-up shirt, and loafers. I find my cellphone and scroll through my contact list until I find Luke’s number.
"What’s up?" he answers.
"Do you want to go out for a drink? It’s been a while."
"Sure," he says. "I’ll meet you at Bridges at seven."
I nod and walk to the mirror to style my hair.
Bridges Bar is a classy cocktail bar in the Hilton hotel. Upper-class people like to socialize there. The décor is industrial-chic, and it's a good place to go for a night that not's going to be too wild.
Luke's already at the bar when I arrive; he's leaning on it with one arm and scoping out the talent. His light hair is cut short. Blue eyes find me, and he grins at me, a million-dollar smile that he’s inherited from his dad. I look around. There are a few women dressed in expensive clothes, but no one catches my eye.
"How are you doing?" he asks when I greet him and lean on the bar as well. I order a Hennessy from the bartender. Luke's sipping a similar amber liquid.
"I’m fine," I say. "Bored, now that my MBA is done."
Luke nods. "I should be so lucky. I told you I failed those two subjects, right? It’s a bitch to catch up."
"I can imagine," I say and accept the drink from the bartender. The whiskey is smooth, slipping down my throat. "How is Claire?"
Luke shakes his head. "I dumped her. Too clingy, you know? I think I’m going to do what you do. Just sleep with whoever comes my way."