The next photo shows me at a nightclub a few years back. I remember this night too. I was wearing a black mini dress and boots that went up to my knees. Damn, I looked good. In the picture I am holding a martini in one hand, and in the other holding the ass of a dark-haired man in his 30s with his mouth on my neck. I am smiling, and I am clearly having a good time in this picture. I'll admit that I may have had a few too many drinks that night, but I had a great time nonetheless.
I am now looking at the third photo. This one is even more personal. It is much more granular than the first two photos, but it clearly shows me in my own bed, naked and riding another man's cock with my head thrown back and my mouth open. Suddenly, I know I do not want to see anymore. It is a disgusting invasion of privacy. I close the manila folder and push it back to my lawyer. It slides across the table.
"If I thought about it too much, I'd be so paranoid that I'd never be able to leave my house. I would start covering the camera lenses on my phone and computers in tape. I'd never open my window curtains. I'd shut down my social media presence entirely. My paranoia could grow exponentially, and fill a whole laundry list of items." But I am not going to let these fuckers win. No fucking way.
"Every one of these photos has been taken without my consent," I continue. "It's clear that the media has been following me for quite some time, and I intend to sue those assholes and teach them a lesson they should have learned long ago," I say.
"The thing is, the story that all of these pictures paint of you isn't a good one."
"Whose side are you on Henry?" I ask.
"I'm just trying to be objective. Please hear me out. Have you considered slowing down? If you are in fact in love with these men, choose one and end the scandals. Settle down. There's nothing wrong with a stable, quiet life."
"Slow down? Are you kidding me? I came in here for legal advice and now I'm paying you $500 an hour for you to lecture me on how to live my life? This is unbelievable. Are you going to personally handle my case, or am I going to have to pass this off to another lawyer in this firm?"
"It was just a suggestion, Ms. Heaton. I hate to see you in this predicament."
I roll the window down as I drive and I let the wind twist its fingers through my hair. After leaving J. Henry Edgar's office, his words keep playing through my mind like a song on repeat: have you considered slowing down? Choose one and end the scandals. Everywhere I look, I see couples walking blissfully down the sidewalk. Then I turn and notice two tall men walking hand in hand. They have short, dark hair and are dressed in tailored suits. They have broad, muscular chests and I can't stop gazing at their well-built bodies. I start undressing them with my eyes, wondering what it would be like to fuck both of them. Would it be like fucking Colt and Ethan? Shit. Why does it feel like I'm losing my mind? I've been with lots of men, so why does it feel different this time, with these two? Why can't I stop thinking about Colt Stackford and Ethan Blake? I never let myself get attached to people. Why now? I shake my head and look away from the two men walking down the street. I can't. I work hard and play hard, but at the end of the day, my career comes first.
But just as quickly as that thought appears, another enters my mind. Maybe the lawyer is right. Maybe I should slow down. I notice I'm now speeding and I release my foot from the gas pedal so that the momentum of my car slows to the legal speed limit. I take a slow deep breath. My life feels like it's spiraling out of control. Things aren't looking good. I don't want to lose Colt and Ethan and I don't want to lose ownership of the New York Nailers. This team means everything to me, but is this what my life has really become—one scandal after another? Should I choose and settle? I realize I'm holding my breath anxiously, and I exhale. After a few tense moments I whisper to myself, I think I know what I need to do.
The next day, I walk onto the administrative floor of the Nailers headquarters. There are not many people around and I can hear the hum of the fluorescent lights overhead. Just as I am about to open my office door, I hear my secretary call out. She is running after me down the hallway, her heels clicking against the thin carpeting.
"Ms. Heaton, I'm so sorry! He insisted on a meeting."
I turn around. "Who insisted on a meeting?"
"Coach Karl. He's here in your office. He's been waiting for you."
Shit. The one day I'm running late and I have someone in my office waiting for me. And that someone is Coach Karl. "How long has he been waiting?"
"About 20 minutes. I asked him if he wanted a coffee, but he said no. I'm sorry if I've done something wrong by allowing him into your office."
"No, it's fine," I assure her. She is clearly frazzled. "You've done nothing wrong. I'll go meet with him now." I wonder what he could possibly want. I take a deep breath, open the door, and step into my office. I see him leaning back into one of the leather armchairs by my desk. He is scrolling through his phone but immediately looks up at me when I enter.
"To what do I owe this surprise today?" I ask.
"I'm sorry to be here unannounc
ed," he says, placing his phone into his pocket. It's just, with everything going on in the media right now, I wanted to talk to you."
"Are you here to lecture me, Karl? Because if so, save your breath. I'm already getting it from all angles. No pun intended. Or perhaps you are here to tell me that you signed the petition too?"
"Listen, can you just let down your guard for once? I know your father—"
"Leave my father out of this!" I say, slamming my coffee mug down onto my desk. There is no way that I want to hear him rip open the past this morning and I am growing impatient with his presence. It is too early to rip open old wounds.
"I know you are surrounded by a media circus right now," he says, trying to soften the situation.
"That's putting it mildly," I scoff.
"And I wanted to say that I know what it's like to have to make difficult decisions." He looks at me with his gentle blue eyes. It is clear he came here to my office today to make peace.
"What do you know about making difficult choices?"
"Many years ago, I had a choice to make. Either I keep your father on as coach, or—" he said, and I grimaced, but allowed him to continue. "Or replace him."
"Yes, well. Shit happens I guess."