Dirty Daddy

But you won't know till you come find out.

2

The New York Daily Journal

It’s Time for Us To Come Together!

Gossip Central on Page Eight. From the Desk of Vicky Durner - All the gossip you never even knew you needed to know!

Good morning Gotham!

Hope you enjoy a nice spraying of cum on your face with that coffee and toast! Because that's exactly what we got yesterday with Magnus Davion at the New York Nailers arena.

In case you just spit out your coffee reading the above line, fear not, brave denizen of New York City. You did read that correctly.

Billionaire real estate mogul Magnus Davion was so happy with his recent purchase of the New York Nailers that he went ahead and began to celebrate by having sex in the skybox of the stadium—during a home game.

I know that in the Tri-State region we try to give billionaires their due. After all, they've managed to accrue all this money so it's only natural that we give them an opportunity to enjoy it. But honestly, if you're going to be enjoying it by sticking your giant rod into the head cheerleader of the team that you bought in the skybox of the stadium where there is a game going on, maybe think about closing the blinds?

Because it didn't take long for the cameras to find Magnus. And when this showman found himself on the JumboTron, did he shy away?

Of course not.

He doubled down.

And sprayed the cheerleader in the face with his love gun. To the cheers of over 50,000 fans.

I'm sorry, but I thought I was going to stadiums to watch football games. I didn't realize I was going to Nailers Arena to watch the live re-enactment of Debbie Does Dallas.

Is this really the kind of environment we want our kids to grow up in?

Do we really want the next generation of New Yorker men to aspire to one day shoot their ejaculate onto a woman's face in front of 50,000 cheering fans?

Because that's exactly what we're doing by rewarding such gross and boorish behavior from Magnus Davion.

How exactly are we rewarding it you ask, my fellow Gothamites?

Consider our tax dollars that we pay to the city of New York. Those tax dollars are being used to procure services from real estate developers.

Think of the Equinox Tower, one of the most iconic and celebrated building projects in the world. Once it's built in three years, it'll be the tallest building in the world.

And right now, the City of New York, which is the landlord for the site, is considering a host of developers to carry this project forward. The chief contender?

Yep. You guessed it.

Davion Development.

It's time for us to put a stop to this.

It's time for us to draw a line in the sand and say that we're done with the filth washing up into our homes. We're done rewarding bad behavior.

I call on all New Yorkers today to join me in telling the city and the state to pull all contracts and refuse to do business with any business entity that's controlled by Magnus Davion.

Start sending him a message that it's not okay to be so focused on yourself that you don't care about anything else.

That it's not okay to be the baddest boy on the block.

That it's time to join the human race.