Princely Passions

So I’m not a geek over comic books. Sue me.

“Yeah, him. So, how can we know for sure if Diesel the Outlaw really is tough and, you know, an outlaw?”

We sit back against the seat, swaying to the left and then to the right in unison as the Uber weaves down the road and around corners. Like a carnival ride, Uber style. I have to wonder if Becca threatened them with a lawsuit if they didn’t get us home in time or something.

“Dick pics!” Ashley announces.

“What?!” Becca and I squeal in unison. I promise, we didn’t practice that. It just sorta happened.

“Yeah. If he’s swinging a big dick, we’ll know he’s at least a man. Plus, then we all get to admire the package he’s packing.”

“Ooohhhhh…I like how you think,” I say, wide-eyed at her brilliance. “God, I’m glad you’re my friend, not my enemy. That level of conniving is genius.”

We screech to a stop outside of my apartment building and as Becca swipes her credit card through the reader – it’s her turn to pay – we all pile out and head to the elevator. Becca squeezes in and as we start the ascent, I begin texting Carlton. God, I hate that name.

I begin texting Diesel.

Much better.

“There,” I say, pressing send. “Now let’s see if he responds. Hopefully, where he’s at really does have phone service.”

The doors open just as my phone vibrates in response.

As you wish.

And then...

“Oh…” Ashley breathes, jostling up against me.

“My…” Becca echoes, squishing in from the other side.

“God,” I finish because someone had to and I promise, we didn’t practice that one either. But the sight of this magnificent cock was literally swoon worthy. I felt a little faint as I stared at the thick, veiny, purple headed cock on my screen.

I hand the phone over to Ashley with a stern, “Don’t drop this and for fuck’s sakes, don’t close that pic!” as I shove my key in the door. Once we’ve made it in the door, we all gather around my phone for some more oogling time.

“I think it’s almost as big as Apollo’s dick,” Ashley finally says, and I just glare at her. There is no way Apollo, a suit, has a dick this big. She shrugs at my glare. “I’ll have to have him do a dick pic sometime so I can show you guys.”

I turn back to the photo in my hand. Apollo is fine and whatever, but he isn’t Diesel. Ashley’s welcome to her boyfriend.

“So, now that we at least know that he’s hung,” Ashley says, “how else can we know that he’s an outlaw?”

We begin cleaning up in the bathroom. Thank god it’s big with double sinks so we can spread out.

“What do all outlaws ride?” Ashley asks, excitement in her voice.

“Horses?” Becca asks, deadpan.

“Outlaws in this century,” Ashley shoots back.

“Motorcycles…” I say slowly. “Ash, you’re a genius!” I drop my hairbrush and begin texting Diesel again. “If you are a real outlaw,” I mutter out loud as I type, “you’ll pick me up on your motorcycle and take me somewhere dangerous on our date. There!” I say, pressing send. “Let’s see what he has to say about that.”

Before I can even put the phone down, it vibrates.

Deal.

“I wonder where he’s going to take you!” Becky squeals, as my phone vibrates again.

Fair’s fair - I showed you mine…