I love him with all my heart, and knowing that he loves me back … Malcolm deserves to know the truth, all of it.
Standing up, I finish my whisky at once and then walk toward the record player.
“Sorry, Joni,” I whisper as I pull off the needle and stash the vinyl disk inside its sleeve. “I’ll play you again, promise.”
Grabbing my car keys and my purse, I take a deep breath and then head out the door.
It’s time to come clean.
25
Athena
I drive all the way to Malcolm’s apartment, courage making my heart beat like a war drum; but now, as the elevator doors close in on me, there’s a knot in my throat. But no, don’t think I’m going to turn around and run; courage brought me here, and courage is going to make sure that I’ll walk all the way to his door and knock. And then… well, then I’ll let the chips fall where they may.
It’s time I’ve stopped living in fear.
It’s time for the truth.
I take a deep breath as I hear the metallic jingle of the elevator doors swinging open and, refusing to wait a second longer, I step outside onto his floor. I make my way toward his door and rap my knuckles against it, my heart racing even faster now. I hear nothing from the other side of the door, so I just knock again.
My knees buckle under my weight as the door finally swings open; on the other side stands Malcolm, handsome as always. He looks at me with an unreadable expression, and then takes one step back to allow me in.
“I’ve been expecting you,” he finally says as he closes the door behind the two of us.
“You’ve… been expecting me?” I ask him as I turn to face him.
“I have,” he merely says, leading the way toward his living room. I follow after him and sit on the couch after he does, placing my purse between the two of us. I run my tongue over my lips, wetting them, and prepare to do what I came here to.
“I came here because… I need to tell you something, Malcolm. I can’t go on like this. I—I have a secret.”
“A secret?” He arches one eyebrow and places one leg on top of the couch, turning so that his whole body is facing me. Folding his arms over his chest, he waits for me to continue speaking. “What kind of secret, Athena?”
“I haven’t been truthful with you. I lied. I… I don’t even know where to start, Malcolm. I feel terrible.” I look into his eyes, waiting for him to say something, but he just stares back at me with that enigmatic expression. I take a deep breath and then find the necessary strength to continue. “Ben has been pressuring me. He wants you to fall in love with me so that you’ll lose the buy-in and… He wants to ruin you, Malcolm, and I’ve been a part of it. He threatened me, and he --”
“I know,” he suddenly says, cutting me short and reaching for me. He lays his hand on top of mine and then opens up into a smile. “I know about everything.”
“Everything…?”
“Everything,” he nods. “Ben, the tapes… I know about it all.”
I’m so stunned that I can’t even look him in the eyes. Averting his gaze, I pull my hand from his and fold my fingers over my lap, looking down at my hands. Malcolm knows…
Oh God.
“I’m sorry, Malcolm, I really am,” I tell him, feeling tears start to sting my eyes. I force myself to look up at him, shame and fear welling up inside my heart.
“Hey, hey,” he whispers, caressing my face with the back of his hand. “I don’t care. I don’t give a fuck, Athena. You came in here, you told me about it… And that’s all that matters. Fuck Ben, fuck the tapes … fuck all that. You’re the only thing that matters.”
“But--”
“You don’t have to worry about anything anymore, Athena. I promise you. I had a bit of luck, and had an anonymous investor who has made a guaranteed investment promise and I used the paperwork from that promise to get an advance loan. I used that money and had Andrew buy the tapes from Ben. You’re safe now,” he continues, his soothing voice making me feel safer than I’ve ever felt. But then, when I finally comprehend the meaning behind his words, I can’t help but jump up to my feet.
“You what?!” I ask him, my jaw hanging open. I can’t believe that he used the money I invested in his company to save me. I gave him a way out, so that he could save himself… And instead he sacrificed himself and his company to save me.
“Yeah, I used that money to buy the tapes. I signed the Love Declaration. Andrew showed Ben and he got so mad and pissed off he wasn’t thinking right and started looking for someone to buy the tapes of you,” Malcolm says.
I stare in horror as Malcolm continues, “I’ll be in debt to the investor, but considering everything I owe… It’s not like it matters. Besides, I don’t give a fuck about money. Not anymore. All I care about is you, Athena,” he says, going up to his feet and taking one step toward me. “You’re my everything.”