But I do know that if there is a God on this planet, that he must have created love for just me and Magnus.
That's right, babe. I know you have your significant other. I know that the world doesn't revolve around Magnus and me.
But that's what it feels like. That's what every moment I think of Magnus Davion feels like. That the world was made for me and him. That every touch, every taste, every feeling and every breath were made for each other. That the vast entirety of this world - that all of history - was designed solely so the two of us could enjoy it.
There is no way I will ever leave this man. There is no way I will ever betray him. Every fiber of my body, every atom of my existence, cries out to be next to him.
And you know what?
I know he feels the same way about me.
I know, in my heart of hearts, that this man has reoriented his life to have it revolve around me. I am the sun to his existence.
He doesn't need to tell me.
I don't need to be near him to be able to understand.
I don't need to see him do or say anything.
It's almost as if...as if...
As if it's faith.
You either have it or you don't.
And I have faith in Magnus Davion.
That's why I'm standing outside the Davion Development building in Midtown East this morning as I watch him, dressed in a smart charcoal black Tom Ford suit, walk to the podium and speak into the microphone.
"Ladies and gentlemen," he says and he scans the crowd. I don't know why I inadvertently shrink back.
I didn't tell him that I was going to be here today. In fact I haven't talked to him for the last three days.
I don't know why.
A part of me realized that maybe I should reach out to him. I wanted to.
But he seemed so busy fighting everyone back.
The world is after him. They're not after me.
I know what it is, actually. I think I felt that if I stayed away from him, then this whole thing would blow over.
Don't look at me like that.
It's not guilt that brought me here. I'd be here whether I wanted to or not. Knowing he was going to be putting himself out there in the public for me - for us - there is no way I'd not be here.
And I think that goes for the entire borough of Manhattan too. It seems the steps to Davion Development are just packed with New Yorkers who have decided that they want to see what this press conference is going to bring.
There's a large contingent of reporters here at the press conference. By far the largest contingent is from the New York Daily Journal.
I can't tell from where I'm standing but it looks like Magnus gave them seats all the way at the front.
I mean, I guess that's one way to go about handling them. After the way they've been treating him and the things that they've been saying, if I were him I wouldn't have even allowed them here in the first place.
That's the thing. He thinks I don't know all the things that are being said about us. He thinks he's protecting me.
I figure, let him think that if it makes him feel better. At least he'll stay strong that way. And that's why I stayed away too, you know? That's why I didn't call him or text him even when I saw he wasn't texting me.