Falling for My Dirty Uncle

These are nipple clamps. They show a picture that shows a woman with the clamps, and the box shows her getting an electric buzzing.

Next to it is a small vibrator bullet. And next to that is a wireless remote.

Oh. My. God.

What do I do? What do I say? I’m holding these two packages and I don’t know what to do here.

“What is all this,” I ask, deciding that confusion is easier to use to hide my embarrassment.

Derrick simply shrugs. "I figured it would help you, love."

“Help me do what?” I ask again. What is he thinking? Just because he looks so delicious and gets my mind all twisted he can give me these…these sex toys for presents?!

“It’ll give you all the pleasure you need, love,” Derrick says with a smile. “Without ever having to deal with a man again.”

Oh. My. God. Again, I’m speechless.

Who the hell does he think he is? That because I pretended to be a stripper that makes me a prostitute?!

I throw the package on the bed.

“Gross!” I yell out loud. “I barely know you!”

“Okay, Daphne, love, listen to me okay,” Derrick says and comes inside my room. Oh God, I can smell his musk. His sweat. His scent. It’s heady and it fogs my brain with desire.

Derrick continues, “You’ve been with this guys for what? 6 months? You’re going to get fucking lonely. And you don’t want to go back to relationship that you know is shit because your body has needs, okay?”

“So what if I could take care of it myself?” I ask. “Maybe I have a whole chest of sex toys.”

Derrick cocks an eye. “Oh really,” he says. “Tell me one thing that you have.”

Right. I have nothing. And nothing to say either.

Derrick continues and I listen to him in silence, trying my best to glare. He continues, “And if you don’t do something about it, Daphne, you and I are going to get in trouble. I know you’re not the kind to go around and casually sleep around with blokes. So fuck me, it’s going to be me. You’re too fucking gorgeous.”

Oh Jeez! Now he’s complimenting me.

“And you remind me too much of a girl I used to know. A girl that I’m realizing I was a fool to let go. If I ever had her in the first place,” he says.

Now my curiosity is unleashed. Could it be the story I’m looking for?

“Why?” I ask. Then I ask again with more urgency. “Who?”

He turns around and walks away, but stops before he crosses the threshold. “Her name was Alicia,” he says. “And I didn’t know it at the time, but seeing you, I can’t get away from the fact that I was in love with her, only I was too stupid to realize it.”

Oh. My.

I don’t know what to say.

Well, it’s a good thing he’s walking out of the apartment. Looks like this conversation was too much for him, too.

I hear the door shut below and Derrick call the elevator and I tremble.

Not because I'm grossed out. I should be, but all I can manage is a pathetic Ew. Gross. And that's only because you're watching.

I'm not grossed out.

I'm so incredibly wet. If I took my panties off right now and threw them against the wall, they’d stick to that wall.