Last Drive On A Freeway
Thank God it’s Friday
I’m going off to have dinner first and then….oh wait, I should start from the beginning.
Oh, 94% of you believe that I should give Bookstore the chance, so it’s a good thing I answered when he called today!
So yesterday I met Freeway for a drink. Close by to my place there is this Spanish tapas palce so we went there. I actually got a dirty martini just so, you know, I’d be a bit drunker and not so shocked when I saw him.
Anyways, so Freeway comes in and OMG, this man is so effing cute. Don’t get me wrong, like Bookstore has bigger muscles and Bookstore is kinda like a hot alpha male nerd, but Freeway just has this confidence vibe going about him. Like he’s like this is my world and I’m gonna have and do whatever I want.
So he walks up to me as if it’s the most natural thing in the world and he kisses me on the cheek. I let him because hey, a girl can only try so much and if a guy is charming I’m sorry I’m gonna be charmed. I know, he was a wierdo a while ago but I mean wearing clothes and out in public, he looks like a billion bucks and I feel like a million bucks just being around him. Like I feel smooth and sophisticated and suave and the music that’s playing is like European Jazz Techno Lounge music from Putumayo or whatever and it’s sleek and sexy and I’m starting to sway to the rhythm and Freeway is saying sweet sexy things to me over drinks and before I know it, it’s been like an hour and I’m feeling this guy.
I know.
I forgot everything. But don’t roll your eyes or anything. It was the mood of the place.
I kiss him. We’re sitting in the corner booth so its not really a PDA. He kisses back.
I don’t wanna go to my place. But they do have single person bathrooms.
I don’t normally do this, but I’m feeling sexy, and I never did get a chance to taste Freeway.
We’re in the bathroom within ten minutes. It’s pretty clean.
“Listen,” I ask this time, and I gulp. Maybe I’m gonna have to learn to live with this. “Are you feeling sexy again?”
“I always feel sexy, Alexis,” Freeway says to me.
“But like underwear wise, are you feeling Very Sexy?” I ask and gesture with my eyes. “Like Very Sexy with lace?”
Freeway shrugs and undoes his pants.
“I have nothing to hide,” he tells me. “You’re going to want me anyways,”
He pulls his pants down and yep. This time it’s a lace cheeky.
But there are also thigh highs.
THIGH HIGHs.
“I’m sorry,” I say, and once again, “Not gonna happen. I tried. I really did.”
I dunno. Maybe I could learn to put up with women’s underwear. Somehow. Who knows. I mean there are thongs for men. And John Tucker did do it too – I forgot who told me that this week.
But several of you were like watch out here comes Caitlin Jenner. And I dunno.
But hosiery?
I left the bathroom. Walked out of the bar. Sexy vibe is still there, but I put some cash down for the drink. Freeway sorta followed me, but I think he realized we’re just not gonna happen.
So then I take out my phone.
I call WineBar.
“Hey,” he answers.
“What kinda underwear are you wearing?” I ask him.