Having The Soldier's Baby (Parent Portal 1)

“Would it be anything like the television show where you’d still be working on ships occasionally? In an investigative capacity?” Winston loved the ships.

“Yes. But truthfully, Em, I’m more into the whole law enforcement/protection part of things now than I am the sailing. I loved it while I did it, but after Afghanistan, I want to use my skills differently.”

“Then by all means, go for it!”

He looked at her. “You really mean that?”

Holding his gaze, she nodded. “I do.”

He wanted to be close to his son. She just couldn’t believe it. And yet...in the midst of all the turmoil something settled deep inside her.

Chapter Twenty

So, hell. Maybe Adamson had been right about talking to Em about his career future. His choices still affected her because of the child if nothing else, even though they were no longer together.

It was good to see her, too. To know that she was taking care of herself. He couldn’t tell if her stomach had grown any—she was wearing uncharacteristically loose clothing. But based on that, he had an idea that she was going to be a particularly sexy pregnant woman. She looked as fine in loose clothes and flip-flops as she did in tight skirts and heels.

He was glad she’d called, suggested they get together.

There were other things to talk to her about, like when she wanted to see lawyers and get his things out of her house, but maybe this was an instance where Time still had work to do. Their split was still so raw, the realization that their love had been a fantasy was years old to him, but brand-new to her.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” he asked, not wanting the silence to get awkward on them.

“I need to know something.” She was looking at her flip-flops.

“I told you I’d tell you anything I could,” he reminded.

“In the past—well, up until two weeks ago from four tomorrow morning—I really believed that we were this special couple. Singled out, chosen, by God or whatever powers that be, to be together. All the plans we made as kids, the vows...that was weird, you know. Most kids don’t do that. And here we were, both of us, wanting all the same things and talking about them, too. I thought it was predestined, and that with all that, as long as we went along with destiny—got married, followed the plan—that we’d be protected. That you’d get orders and leave, but always come back to me. I didn’t have to worry about it. I just knew. And when you came back, I’d be here healthy and happy and waiting for you. Even when we had trouble getting pregnant and I was looking at my age and knowing that four kids might become a stretch for us, I just figured that the universe knew better. That if I had to have a baby at forty, we’d be protected and that baby would be born healthy. Our love was that strong. That special.”

“You had to know at some point it would end.” He told her what he knew. “No one lives forever.”

“I thought we’d die of old age, within hours or days of each other, when both of us felt as though we’d had complete lives. When we were ready.”

He couldn’t speak to that. Wasn’t really sure what she wanted from him.

“I need to know what you believed, Win.”

Her voice was a thread.

“I don’t know,” he said. He knew what she’d described was a dangerous fantasy.

“Back then, when we talked about all that stuff, were you just humoring me?”

“Of course not.”

“So...did you believe it, too?”

“No” was on the tip of his tongue. Until he looked at her.

She needed his truth.

No matter how much it hurt.

“Yes.”

* * *

The following Friday Winston called Emily, said he had a favor to ask her, asked if he could come into town, maybe pick up a few things. She’d had a long week at work, a good successful week, a lot of late days, was hungry and tired, but of course she said yes.