She laughed. And stopped. Sex had never been funny before. Or particularly fun, either. It had felt good, but been focused. Serious.
“Is it always this intense for you?”
“You mean, has the sound of a woman’s voice ever made me forget my own name, like yours does?”
His honesty spun her out of control. Jon wasn’t only the first man she’d been truly interested in since Kirk, he was a whole new world for her.
“You’ve got it bad, sir,” she told him with newfound freedom, prepared to fly as high as he’d take her.
“Guilty as charged.” He didn’t seem to mind as he leaned forward and kissed her again, his lips open against hers from the start, his tongue probing the inside of her mouth.
It was just physical, he’d assured her.
But she couldn’t take him in far enough, couldn’t get far enough into him. Her whole being pushed toward him, needing far more than he was giving her.
Needing him to touch places that hadn’t been touched in too many years. And a thought struck her....
She hadn’t had sex since Braydon. She’d given birth to him naturally and things had...changed. Would sex hurt?
Would Jon be able to tell that she’d given birth?
She should know these things, but she didn’t.
There’d been no reason for her to ask her doctor about postnatal intercourse when she’d had Braydon.
“What’s wrong?” Jon had stopped kissing her.
She panicked. And still wanted him. “Abraham,” she managed to get out. “What about Abraham?”
“He’s sound asleep.”
“What if he wakes up?”
Frowning, Jon held her shoulders, gently rubbing them. “I’m not sure,” he said. “You’d know better than I would about something like that. What do parents do if their kids wake up while they’re having sex?”
“Best-case scenario is that they’re in their bedroom with the door locked so there are no surprises.” She could breathe again and was feeling better.
“I have a lock on my door.”
Okay. Good.
No one in Shelter Valley knew about Braydon. She’d lost him in her old life. “I don’t have any birth control. Do you?” she asked.
She was a professional who w
orked in the medical field.
And her body had been inhabited by a wanton woman who was taking her places she wasn’t sure she was ready to go.
But she wanted to go.
God, how she wanted to.
CHAPTER TWENTY
“I HAVE CONDOMS.”
Jon answered Lillie’s birth control question. But they weren’t going to have sex. At least, not that night. The shadows in her eyes made that clear, even if her questions did not.