“But you didn’t do anything to me.”
His mouth twisted in a fully masculine smirk. “I think Dr. Mac would disagree with you on that.”
Phyllis blushed, looked down at the steps and then grinned. “As I recall the, uh, activity that got us here was definitely mutual.”
“I should’ve known that condom couldn’t possibly be safe.”
“Have you spent your whole life doing this?” Phyllis asked curiously. She liked having him there beside her. He brought warmth to the chilly evening air.
“Doing what?”
“Blaming yourself for things you couldn’t possibly have helped.”
Matt was quiet for a few long minutes. “I could’ve had a little more control that day we were…together. Stopped things before they got so out of hand.”
“I suppose so. Though the same could be said for me.”
“Have you been doing this all your life?” he asked, sending her a sideways grin. It was a grin that reached his dark eyes. It was the first time she’d seen that happen.
“Doing what?” she asked, unable to look away from that gleam in his eyes.
“Taking guilt away from people.”
“Is that what I’m doing?”
“I hope so. It sure feels like it.”
“Is it working?”
“I don’t know yet. But maybe.”
She hoped so. He was a good man. And far too hard on himself. He was blaming himself for giving her the one thing she’d never have sought for herself. The one thing that had been missing from her happiness. A family of her own.
She’d feel much better about their association if she could somehow help him find a measure of happiness, too. Help him come to terms with whatever was haunting him.
“I was just on my way down to the diner for chicken enchiladas,” she said casually. “Want to join me?”
He took too long to answer her. She knew that whatever answer he gave her wasn’t going to be the one he wanted to give.
She wished she hadn’t asked.
“No,” he finally said, standing. “I should get home and chlorinate the pool.”
Phyllis wondered if that was a man’s version of having to “wash my hair.” But she didn’t mind. He really wanted to go with her.
Which meant that, for both their sakes, he’d answered her invitation correctly.
“Sounds fun,” she said, standing up beside him. “See ya.”
In control once again, she went back inside for her keys. Maybe she’d pick up dessert for Ben and Tory and Alex while she was at the diner. Tory had been craving apple cobbler throughout her entire pregnancy.
And no one made apple cobbler like the Valley Diner.
She waited until Matt had driven away before she locked up and headed out herself. She was glad he was gone.
But she wondered, as she drove downtown, if there was anything Matt Sheffield craved.
And she wondered why finding out suddenly mattered so much.