Another Man's Child

She’d cried when she’d talked to Beth on the phone. And she’d cried when he’d carried her by the door to the nursery they’d decorated, too. Her heart was breaking, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.

He waited outside the hospital nursery while Lisa visited the baby, though a well-meaning nurse had invited him in, too, with the provision that he scrub and dress as Lisa had in the sterile garb. He saw the look of hope in Lisa’s eyes, but she didn’t ask him to come. He wanted to be there for her, to fulfill her wishes, but he just couldn’t cross that final line. He’d be there for her, but outside the nursery.

The entire time Lisa was in with her baby, he watched the child, as he had the night before, thinking that her color looked a little better, though she was still awfully red. Most of the tubes and wires were just as they’d been that morning. Marcus didn’t know if that was good news or bad. Still, he prayed for the child. Prayed she had what it took to win with the impossible hand she’d been dealt.

He noticed, too, that her nameplate had been changed. Sara Barbara Cartwright. She still had his name.

OLIVER PICKED BETH UP from work the next evening. After spending most of the afternoon with Lisa, he needed a means of forgetfulness. They drove straight to his house and she was barely in his door before he took her in his arms. Not with passion, that would come later, but with warmth, seeking and giving comfort,

“I’ve needed this since the hospital called yesterday,” he said.

“Me, too. I’ll bet you barely made it home in time to get Marcus’s call. We’re going to have to tell them about us, you know,” Beth said.

“Yes. But not yet.” Oliver was afraid to trust the happiness that had begun to bloom in him again. It seemed so delicate, so fragile.

“Not until we know more about Sara’s condition?”

“Right.”

“You think Lisa’s going to take our relationship hard?”

“Maybe. What do you think?” Oliver had been wanting to ask her that since the first time he’d kissed her. Beth was Lisa’s best friend. In some ways she knew his daughter better than he did.

“I think she’s going to be shocked,” Beth said. “And I’m sure she doesn’t need to hear about it now.”

“Then we’ll have to be careful for a while.”

“Right.” She kissed him gently, almost innocently.

“I’m a grandpa.”

She smiled at him softly. “I know. She’s beautiful.”

“She is, isn’t she? Prettiest one there. And the strongest, too. She’ll be making more noise than all the others combined before we know it.”

Beth pulled out of his arms, turning her back as she moved to the front window and looked out. “Her chances aren’t very good, Oliver. You realize that, don’t you?”

He stood his ground. “I hear what they’re saying.”

?

??This is one time I wish I didn’t know even half of what I learned in medical school.” She shivered. “The things that could go wrong…I can’t even imagine the hell Lisa must be putting herself through.”

Oliver hated to think of the anguish his own little girl must be suffering. He’d watched her torture herself all afternoon. It was just too much. First she’d lost her baby sister. And then her mother.

They weren’t going to lose Sara Barbara, too. They just weren’t.

SARA’S HEART CONTINUED to beat. As the hours turned slowly into days, the baby lay in her warming crib, relying on a respirator for her every breath, but still alive. Her oxygen level fluctuated, her body temperature fluctuated, and she slept constantly. But she was alive.

A week after the baby’s birth, Lisa’s doctor ordered Lisa back to work. Part-time only, and nothing but office calls, but back to work. Debbie was worried about Lisa’s mental state and said that working would not only give Lisa something to do other than anticipate what could go wrong with Sara, it would also bring her closer to Sara for more hours during the day.

Marcus agreed with Debbie’s reasoning, knowing that being near her baby would bring its own measure of comfort to his wife.

He returned to work himself, though only part-time, as well. He wasn’t going to leave Lisa home alone any more than he had to. Nor was he going to have her sitting in the nursery viewing room for hours every day letting her fears eat her alive. Instead, he bought her a ship-to-shore radio and took her to the Sara. He picked up several romantic comedies at the video store and sat through them with her, although he had to take cold showers after every one of them. He missed making love to his wife.

And daily, he told her how strong she was, how capable, hoping that if she ever needed to rely on that strength, she’d know it was there.

He also held her when the anguish was too much for her and she could no longer hold back her sobs.