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Fire in the Blood

Page 42

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He caught her face between his hands and said huskily, 'It will be different this time, Nadine! I'll try not to get jealous...'

'Oh, yes?' she asked him with a cynical smile. 'For how long? While we were on the island I kept telling you I wasn't having an affair with Jamie, I'd never had an affair with Jamie, but you still exploded because you saw me with him at the airport!'

His mouth indented. 'I said I'd try! I didn't say I'd always manage it. I can't help being jealous of you; I love you so much it makes me see red whenever another man goes near you.'

Her heart turned over and she felt her knees go weak, but she couldn't let the pattern repeat itself all over again. She had to be firm with him. 'Can

't you see how embarrassing that is for me, not to mention what a strain it is to have you going into a rage if another man says hello to me?'

He frowned. 'Yes, it must be. I hadn't thought of it like that, Nadine.'

'Not to mention the fact that it means you don't trust me an inch—how do you think I feel about that?'

She felt the sigh he gave. 'I told you! I do trust you! It's them, not you, I'm afraid of.'

Nadine froze, staring up at his tense, pale face.

'Afraid of?' she repeated and saw the dark flush crawl up his face, saw his jaw tighten.

'What I meant was...' He broke off, groaning. 'No, that was what I meant—I've always been afraid I'd lose you. You know my parents were divorced—my mother was a very beautiful woman. She went off with another man when I was fourteen, and my father took it very badly. I watched him fall apart—it ruined his life—and I swore to myself then that I'd never let that happen to me, I'd never care that much about any woman. Then I met you and I couldn't help myself. I cared, badly, and I was terrified that some day someone would come along and take you away from me the way somebody took my mother from my father.'

She had known that his parents had divorced when he was in his teens, and that his father had died of a heart attack a few years later. She had met his mother only once or twice since the older woman was currently with her third husband in the States and had shown no real interest in either her son or his wife; but this was the first time Sean had ever told her how his parents' marriage had broken up and how it had affected him, and it altered everything.

Huskily she said, 'Why didn't you tell me all this long ago?'

'I hate talking about it!'

'But can't you see what a difference it makes, to understand why you should be the way you are? It makes sense of what seemed completely crazy.'

He watched her intently, his blue eyes dark with emotion. 'Does it? I wish I could make sense of you, darling. When we were together on the island I was so sure you loved me, every response you gave was so strong; and yet you suddenly flew off without even leaving me a note! How could you do that to me?'

'I had to get away, I was in such a muddle. You aren't the only one who has been scared, Sean. I was terrified. I'd been trying to live without you since we split up and not doing very well, but at least life was more peaceful, and then you arrived at the hotel and from then on I felt like someone on a roller-coaster ride, never knowing what would happen next, my life utterly out of control. When we made love it got worse, I got more scared—I had to get away and think.'

'And now?' he whispered. 'How do you feel now, Nadine?'

She looked at him helplessly, still torn between her aching need for him and her own common sense, and his eyes flared.

'Darling,' he said in a low, hoarse murmur, and then his mouth came down, searching for hers, and she swayed towards him like a sapling in a gale, unable to fight or resist. She should have run for the nearest exit the minute she saw him again, at the TV studios, or, if not then, when he turned up in her bed at the hotel on the island. She should have fled at the first symptom, not left it until it was too late. It was too late to escape: she admitted that as his mouth trapped hers and hungrily demanded a response, as his arms went round her and drew her so close that she could scarcely breathe. She didn't even try to escape. She moaned and ran her own arms round his neck and kissed him back with a passion as deep and hot as his.

The whole world seemed to stop spinning, they were poised together in a bewitched silence, their eyes shut, their bodies clinging, their mouths moving passionately.

Then the phone rang. They were so hyper-tense that the noise was like a gun-shot. They leapt apart, eyes flying open, dazed. Then Sean swore under his breath, turned and bellowed towards the door leading into Larry's secretary's office. 'Answer that phone, can't you, Miss Simmonds?'

There was a brief silence, then a tapping at the door.

'Well?' Sean roared. The tapping came again, and he snapped, 'Oh, come in!'

The door opened. Nadine hurriedly moved away and stood by the window looking out, breathless and very flushed, nervously straightening her dishevelled hair with one hand.

'Sorry, Mr Carmichael, but it was me ringing you,' Larry's secretary mumbled. 'Only there's an urgent call for you and Mr Dean had told me not to disturb you, but you had said if Mr Salvatore rang to put him through at once, so I didn't know what to do, so I rang you to ask...'

'Why didn't you tell me at once?' Sean bit out. 'Axe you too stupid to follow instructions? Put the call through here now.'

'Yes, Mr Carmichael, of course, sorry...' The secretary sounded as if she was going to cry. She rushed out and Nadine turned to give Sean a wry glance.

'Poor girl, why do you bully her like that? She does her best.'

'Her best is not good enough,' he retorted. 'That call was urgent. I told her a dozen times to make sure it was put through at once but she still dithered.'



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