“Then why are we having sex if it’s not even a little more than that?” All he does is shrug. Shrug! I sit up and slap his arm. “You’re a fucking asshole, Ian! We aren’t just friends. I don’t know if we’ve ever been just friends.”
“Well, we are!” He sits up as well. “That’s it, Sydney.”
“Bull. Shit. Twice now you’ve driven twenty-one hours straight to see me. No one does that for just anyone!”
“You’re right. I did that for my best friend.”
I huff and look away from him. This is a disaster. How can he think we’re only friends? How can he be so cold toward me right now? This doesn’t make sense. “Why don’t you want more?”
“Because I don’t. I don’t want a commitment. You’re the type of girl who deserves the whole nine yards and I don’t want any of that with you.” He’s killing me. I don’t know how I’m still breathing. It’s not that he doesn’t want a relationship in general. He doesn’t want that with me. Ian is quiet for a moment. “Fuck, Sydney. I have a girlfriend.”
My body locks up. “Since when?”
“Since right before prom,” he replies quietly.
“And you still slept with me? You’re cheating on her with me!” I shout. His jaw drops, his eyes widening, as if it just now occurred to him.
“Shit. I just...when I come to see you, she never crosses my mind, so I didn’t even think that I shouldn’t.”
“Well, you shouldn’t have! I can’t believe you! Are you sleeping with her, too?”
Ian glances down at his lap. That’s all the confirmation I need.
This time, I have no choice but to run for the bathroom and throw up. It’s one thing to date other people, but at no point should he be sleeping with us both.
“Babe,” he says softly.
“Don’t call me that!” I push his hands away, not wanting his help to hold my hair out of the way. Another round of vomit comes. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and face him afterward. “You don’t love me? Not even a little?” I hate that my voice cracks. I hate that I’m still hoping this train wreck can somehow be salvaged.
“No,” he answers with such simplicity I want to slap him.
The tears won’t be withheld anymore as my heart hardens. “Fine.” I shove his arm as I move past him. He doesn’t say anything at all as I get dressed and grab my bag. I don’t know what bothers me more. The fact that he slept me while having a girlfriend or the fact that he had no problem at all telling me he doesn’t love me.
As I open the door to leave, he says, “Maybe we shouldn’t sleep together anymore.”
“You think?” I snap. “You’re a fucking idiot if you think I’m ever going to sleep with you again, especially if you have a girlfriend. That’s wrong, Ian.”
“I know.” At least he sounds ashamed of himself.
“Does she know about me at all?”
He shakes his head.
“Then what do you tell her?”
“That I’m visiting family.” He swallows hard and meets my gaze. “I’m sorry, Sydney.”
“Yeah, me too.” With that, I leave. I can’t leave the parking lot because I break down crying in my car. This is not how it was supposed to happen. We probably shouldn’t talk at all anymore if he has a girlfriend. How pathetic is that? I still want to be friends with him. Realistically, I don’t think I can do it. Not for a long time at least. If he had shut me down easy, we could have moved on like it never happened.
Instead, he destroyed me and let me in on the fact that he cheated with me.
Eventually, I make it back to the house. Logan seems to be the only one home.
“Where is everyone else?”
“They all went to grab dinner. What are you doing here? What happened?” He wipes a few stray tears from my cheeks.
“It’s over.”